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| Submitted By: Manchoo | Submitted: 04/04/05 |
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A Investigative Report
Toilet paper is a tissue paper product designed for the cleaning of the anus after defecation or the genitals after urination. Recently i have been concerned over the use, quality and politics of toilet paper. Before the invention of toilet paper people would often use wool, lace or hemp for their cleaning needs. Thanks to a man by the name of Joseph Cayetty the invention of toilet paper was mass produced. Even more importantly in 1942 in St. Andrew's Paper Mill in England the wonder of 2-ply toilet paper was given life. Annother important date to mention is one year later when the first novelty toilet paper was used. This toilet paper featured images of Hitler. My main concern and reason for writing this article is: if in 1942 2-ply toilet paper was invented then why the flying fuck is 1-ply used today. There is no point to using that useless crap! Company's all around the world are still using this horrible, thin and frankly uncomfortable product in their bathroom stall for paying customers to have to bunch up in their hands for the fear of having brown residue on there hands. Sure it saves you money by the role but people end up using 2 times as much anyways. Most schools (post secondary included) are the famous abusers of this. High schools are probably the only ones that deserve to have this horrible fate because after all, half of the toilet paper in high schools isn't used for hygienic reasons. In the end i have no real solution for the problem except for being ignorant assholes and harrasing the management of the educational facility, restaurant or business that you are shitting at. Another cause for concern is the installation of toilet paper. During my research i came across a site that explained the different ways of installing toilet paper (Source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toilet_paper) Installation There are two common methods of installing toilet paper on the toilet paper roll. Often a matter of stern debate, and a contentious problem in households with opposing viewpoints, the variances are mainly that of personal preference. The first method of installation has the edge of the roll facing away from the wall and commonly facing the toilet. This method allows the defecator easy access to grab the toilet paper and pull off the desired amount of paper, as the roll spins toward the user. The second method of installation has the edge of the roll facing the wall and commonly facing away from the toilet. This method is a bit more difficult for the defecator to grab the toilet paper. As the roll spins it spins away from the user. A perceived advantage to this method, that some feel outweighs the inconvenience of the inaccessible edge, is that a household with toddlers is less likely to have toilet paper spun off the roll. This is because a toddler is most likely to spin the roll toward them. In the case of this installation, as the roll spins toward the toddler, the paper remains wound on the roll. I hope you have enjoyed my seemingly pointless article on something we all take for granted because if it wasn't for toilet paper we would all be using the sears catalog. |
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