fuck i am so sorry again everyone .
havent been able to go on my computer for a while and by the time i came on nex tonite,
there was 30 more NEW messages that fucking got automatically deleted .
christ ...
so again i am very sorry .
if anyone and everyone could just let me know who all these messages were from ,
thatd be grand .
thanks guys .
and again , my apologies =(
I am so so sorry to everyone's messages that I didn't reply to ,
I haven't been on nex in so long that 21 messages got automatically deleted and I
have no idea who they were all from , so im sorry about that . But please just
message me if you think you were one of those people , thank you =)
Quote :
B&B [if your a real freind youll read this]
kaii so this has been running im my veins
and i cant deal with it anymore.
So i know 2 people,
1.) shes gonna do drugs.
2.) Hes a fucking douche bag for.. everything.
to mee these to people mean the world to me.
both have been friends for a long time.
and im SO FUCKING FUSTRATED right now,
cuz she could do alot better than to throw herself
into shit like that. and HE could realize whats
under his fucking stupid ass boy nose, cuz before
its to late shes gonna be gone for goodd, and i really
hope your happy where you are now, cuz its causing
her pain that i cant fix anymore, shes not the same
and it hurt me SO badly.
I CANT believe you would tell her how much you
missed her, and she just started to get over you.
then when she told you how she felt, how she
would risk it all for you, you broke her heart.
now i barely even know her.
its so fucked up. and now im on the verge of giving up on her
cuz the one person that means the most to me is faultering.
my best friend. If i were a boy id try and understand, but YOU
are just a boy, you NEVER understand.
Friends only entry posted on Thursday November 20, 2008, 10:01 pm
End Quote .
wow babee ... im so so srry =(
i didnt mean to hurt you like this .
not you , never you ..
Im so srry .
You know that i lovee you so much .
And i didnt mean to go where you cant follow ,
its just , i dunno . it helps me cope .
feels like im alive again .. numbs all my pain .
like i can be a happy normal person again .
and i know its terrible cuz im making it sound like drugs are the only thing that
make me feel this way anymore ; ;
but their not .
you do .
you and all of our good friends do .
there is only you and a few other people that have actually kept me alive to this point .
and i thank you so so much .
I lovee you more than anything you know that .
I just dont want to lose you ,
and im srry if it seemed like i was pushing you away .
id never try to do anything like that to you ..
i lovee you too much .
I couldnt live without you .
And again im so so srry .
I will try my best to stop with you know what .
I lovee you so much .
im srry again,
and honestly :
thank you for caring when no one else seemed to .
Thank you loveey <3<3
Funny how things work out ; ;
Happy Fucking Birthday Bridget .
Put a nice big smile on your face ; ;
Your supposed to be happy .
It's your birthday , cmon now they say .
Smile for the camera .
Happy Sixteenth Birthday there sweetie .
Dearest Bee ,
I have always wanted to______________ you .
You have a cute________________ .
You make me ____________ .
Your personality is__________________ .
I will never forget when you______________________ .
Someday I hope to _________________ with you .
You are an _____________ friend .
If I saw you now I'd __________________ .
The first time I met you was ____________________ .
_________________________ was my first impression of you .
I would build a ____________ just for you .
Your best asset would be _______________________ .
I would get your name tattooed on my __________ .
You and ___________ would be the perfect couple .
This song reminds me of you: _____________________ .
We could _______________under the stars .
I love you like a _______________ .
Love
__________________________
im so so sorry .
I shouldnt have beaked at you like that ..
you dont deserve it .
im just soo upset still ..
and i wanna see you ,
but i have a feeling you dont wanna see me .
and i have a feeling its just gunna get harder
for me to get over you if we do hang out ,
and its unfair to Sarah .
She is your lovee now and i have to understand that ..
as heartbreaking as it is .
everyone keeps saying it will pass it will pass
time will heal it all ,
but what they dont know is how long and painful
the wait is to be truly happy again .
they have no idea or understanding how hard it is to get
over someone like you .
your sparkling blue eyes ,
your perfect smile ,
your heart warming laugh ,
your soothing voice ,
your loving hugs ,
your warm cuddles ,
and your sweet kisses .
and i am suffering terribly ..
im just glad ive learned to keep my emotions hidden ..
it helps stop people from asking questions about you and i .
if my emotions show , then they notice .
and when they notice they ask questions .
and when they ask questions about it ..
thats when i start to lose it again ..
and have to try so hard hold back the angry , painful tears
ready to run down my cheeks .
and i wanna talk to you ,
but its so hard when i still love you so much ,
and i know your heart now belongs to someone else .
i am dying to talk to you ..
havent heard your voice in weeks ,
but im so very afraid that were going to have
those "firm discussions" yet again
and ill end up making us both upset .
I still love you ,
and im hoping that soon it will fade away ,
along with all the amazing memories weve had together .
and i know i dont deserve you anymoree .
so i congradulate you Sarah ,
on having one of the most wonderful guys
out there all smitten for you , and as your loving boyfriend.
i hope you two are very happy together ,
and have a long lasting happy relationship .
Have a nice life .
" So long and goodnight . "
We skipped class and I,
I guess our heads needed a break
But our bodies stayed busy
I know that you still miss me
I give and you take it
Two summers spent wasted
Should we give up or save it?
Will this make sense at all?
After the fall
(After the fall)
We faded, I'm freezin'
(After the fall)
We had it all
Now I'm barely breathin'
Did you have to turn your back
When forever didn't last?
Two years and six months
Have you even looked back once?
Your body felt like summer
But we spent the fall apart
And we'd know by December
If the cold could remember
I give and you take it
Two summers spent wasted
Should we give up or save it?
Will this make sense at all?
After the fall
(After the fall)
We faded, I'm freezin'
(After the fall)
We had it all
Now I'm barely breathin'
I miss you
Is it still okay to say it?
I miss you
I know that it's too late but
We'll all stay in to hide the seasons
Feel the same for different reasons
We lost the road but I prefer it
We're used to bein' so discouraged
I give and you take it
Two summers spent wasted
Should we give up or save it?
Will this make sense at all?
After the fall
(After the fall)
We faded, I'm freezin'
(After the fall)
We had it all
Now I'm barely breathin'
So friday night was fucking amazing <3<3<3
its gotta be the most fun and the happiest ive been in months =)
soo awesomee and soo fun .
thank you soo much to all of you for taking care of me in the end of the night there ;
im soo soo srry and quite embarassed lol
but i did appreciate all your guys help thank you <3
i hope everyone had a just as great time as i did
and im soo glad i was able to come make it there
and hang out with all the amazing people there .
you guys are such wonderful friends <3<3
i lovee you all ! ! ! !
Cant wait to see you guys tomorrow .
again , thank you so much<3
Happy Belated Bday To You Megs <3<3
