Ways to annoy people at a grocery store

1. Buy one grape. Just one. Then claim that you don't have enough money to pay and walk off furious.
2. Move "wet floor" signs to carpeted areas.
3. Challenge people to shopping cart races.
4. Go into the canned goods aisle, and make towers of Spaghettio's in the middle of the floor.
5. Take things from people's carts, and write IOU notes.
6. Go to the checkout line, and when it's your turn, order a cheeseburger with fries. Refuse to move until your demands are met.
7. Put up fake sale signs, and insist that you shoud get money off.
8. Get italian bread, and challenge people to duels while swinging it around like a sword.
9. Demand to see the manager, and when he/she comes, request a song to be played over the intercom system.
10. Spray people with air fresheners in the cleaning aisle.
11. Buy two lobsters, and let them go on the floor. Take bets on which one will win the lobster race.
12. Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax. If someone comes up to you, order a martini while fanning yourself.
13. Stand in front of a security camera, and give a news report. Drag peple over to be interviewed.
14. Throw papers with cryptic messages over the aisles.
15. Get a bunch of friends together, and play hide-and-go-seek.
16. Go up to the clerk, say "code Red" and see what they do
17. Play chicken with another person using grocery carts.
18. Put M&M's on layaway.
19. Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.
20. Put "reserved" signs in the checkout lanes when you first come in, so that people won't take your spot on line.
21. If the meat section serves people using numbered papers, pull all the numbers out of the dispensor and for each number, order one thin slice of ham. Have each of your orders packaged separately.
22. When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, "Red Rover!"
23. Stand between the automatic doors, and scream when they start to close. Repeat.
24. Walk behind someone as their advisor, making comments on everything they pick up.
25. Go to the candy aisle, and if a fat person starts to pick up some, shake your head sadly.



Ways to annoy people in an elevator

1. Set up a lemonade stand.
2. Hum the Mission Impossible theme song while darting your eyes around.
3. Drop a dollar, and when someone goes to pick it up for you, shriek, "THAT'S MINE"
4. Lick Gummy Bears and stick them to the walls.
5. Push all the buttons for each floor.
6. Whenever someone comes on, introduce yourself, give the person a nametag, and then introduce the newcomer to everyone else.
7. Start doing yoga.
8. Play with the emergency telephone.
9. When only one other person's on the elevator, fart and then try to pin it on the other person.
10. Rip a plushie toy's head off, and then when someone comes into the elevator, put on a police hat and tell them that there has been a murder and you would like to take them in for questioning.
11. Run back and forth banging into as many people possible, screaming that you're claustrophobic.
12. Spit ball the cieling so that little pieces of paper keep falling on people's heads.
13. Start a sing-along.
14. Ask people what floor they're going to, and then press every button but theirs.
15. Stare at someone coldly until they ask what is wrong, and then say that they're standing on your imaginary friend.
16. Blow bubbles.
17. Tell knock-knock jokes.
18. Shove a whole bag of pop-rocks in your mouth, and then stick out your tongue so that passengers can hear and see the action.
19. Put a welcome mat by the doors, and then demand that everyone wipe their feet before entering.
20. Pretend to have a conversation on your phone about if your ass looks fat, hang up, and then proceed to ask everyone else if your ass looks fat.
21. Stick stink bombs in people's shopping bags, but make sure that they don't go off until the person is off the elevator.
22. Bring a notepad, and scribble furiously while looking at other people. If they try to see what you're writing, pull away.
23. Give passengers coupons for a free ice cream, and then wink suggestively.
24. Leave a box between the doors so they can't close.
25. Make people sign in and out of the elevator on a sheet.



Ways to annoy people on the beach

1. Tie a shark fin to your head and swim around, scaring the little kids.
2. Rub lotion on random people's backs.
3. Recruit kids to make sand bombs, and then throw the bombs at people's backs.
4. Go underwater and grab random people's legs
5. Go swimming in a full business suit.
6. Set up a volleyball net, and spike the ball at people who walk by.
7. Bring a remote controlled car, and keep ramming it into other people's umbrellas until they're knocked over.
8. Throw sandcrabs in people's food.
9. Impersonate a beach badge checker. When someone gives you their badge, just take it and run away.
10. Bring a bell, stand at the top of the beach, and ring it, pretending that you're an ice-cream person.
11. Swim in the little pools that people bring for their babies.
12. Pretend you're a seagull, flapping your wings and trying to take people's food.
13. Bring a radio, and blast polka music.
14. Go up to the lifeguard, and keep asking why he or she isn't moving in slow motion like in Baywatch.
15. Hand out floaties to people headed into the ocean.
16. Pretend to drown.
17. Knock over little kids' sand castles.
18. Throw pieces of bread at people so they're attacked by seagulls.
19. Bring a kayak into the water, and catch a wave, running over as many people as possible.
20. Every time when you're about to duck under the water, yell, "Down periscope!"
21. Throw jellyfish at people.
22. Grab people's cell phones and throw them in the water, giggling as they wash up on shore. Repeat.
23. Throw a stuffed animal into the water, rescue it, and perform CPR.
24. Bury yourself, and then pop up to surprise people when the walk by.
25. Laugh at fat people in bathing suits.