So virtually all the warehouse staff at Visions quit today. Eventually we got fed up with management's ongoing bullshit regarding our department, and buggered off. Our initial plan was to do it today anyway... but then our boss ran into Adam, took him aside, and fired him. This was presumably because Adam was considered by management to be "the ringleader of bad attitudes" in the warehouse, supposedly guiding us along in his rebellion, undermining everyone else's authority. Clearly. Since we warehouse personnel are obviously incapable of forming our own thoughts and opinions about the job, or anything for that matter, so we all blindly followed Adam's wicked ways.
Anyway, long story behind all that. But essentially, we got fed up, and Adam's initial demotion and subsequent termination was the final straw. After being escorted out of the store, he sent Andrew and I a text message saying "Initiate!". By that he meant Operation InTheButt, our code name for such a mass exodus, one we'd been preparing for weeks ago.
Casually sipping at my coffee, I wandered up to the store front and chatted to our admin lady Carol for a couple minutes. She mentioned something about her disappointment with Adam and his getting fired, to which I replied, "oh, just you wait."
"What do you mean, Fluffy?"
"Oh, you'll see. You'll see."
In the meantime, Andrew and Dan buggered off outside for a smoke, while I casually perused through the morning paper. Then I shrugged and went back to the warehouse.
While our disgruntled warehouse manager Tim (or Teabag, as we referred to him) sat at his desk, staring at hockey forums instead of working (as per usual), I sat down at Adam's former desk and quickly conjured up a resignation letter:
"I hereby submit this letter to signal my resignation from my position as a warehouse lackey. This job is crap, I feel. You, sir, are a salad tosser, and I don't appreciate your attitude. In the meantime, I'm off to do more productive things with my time. Have a fantastic, joyous, and otherwise groovy day.
Ciao,
Alexandre Popravko
Warehouse Lackey and Something-Or-Other"
I made a quick walk around the warehouse for the final time, proudly gazed at the Gallery Of Scissors (a single wall in the back we used as target practice... and the sole reason why all the scissors and screwdrivers in the store went missing), grinned, and went back to the front, where I found Jordon (the douchey store manager of ours).
Casual as always, I perused through the drawers behind the cash desk until I found a roll of tape; I taped my warehouse key to the resignation letter, then waltzed over to Jordon, plopped the sheet in front of him. Making the motion one would make if one were tilting a hat, I said, winking, "Here, Jordon. Be seein' ya." And that was that. I left.
Forever.
