it appears you have died.
i guess yu were fun
while you lasted.
im so lucky;
to have what i do.
the people i have
to call my frineds
and the one i get to love.
ive screwed it up so many times
before and finally; FINALLY im doing
good....and yet i cant seem to do
anything other than miss you;
and the time we had together.
maybe its not you i miss
but that sense of rightness;
of family; of solace...
of happiness.
synthetic or not;
it was there.
we were there.
and i miss it.
more than anything else.
sometimes i wonder if you
miss me.....can you miss me>?
god i miss the times we had;
the cold nights, the bad trips and
the good ones, your mama making
us scarfs, and perogey night at the shelter.
i miss risking getting caught for sneaking
into the strat; just so we could could steal
the darts and piss of bruce.
i miss how you kept me alive.
i miss hearing yu say my face
was almost always melting;
and hearing you laugh when you
woke up rolling down the hill.
i miss sharing whiskey to
stay warm on christmas.
and i miss your hugs.
because they always
made everything better.
i miss you.
so much.
and i just wanted you to
no that i still love you;
and you were truly someone
who changed my life forever.
so;
happy 24th birthday
Jerramiee.
love
Jelly<3
how is it even
the day i think is
going super fabulous;
ends up being a shitty
bruised and angry shell>?
fuck you life.
fuck you indeed.
I HATE YOU.
fuck you and your
shitty import managers
fuck you indeed.
i really really really
dont want to go to work.
urghhhhh.
the junior years;
Ju;
and all the days of ju n ru madness and cookie dough
Heather;
and all the nights of boy meets world and science projects
Sammie V;
and the rediculous summers we spent at her house
Victoria;
and the crazy church adventures to YC
Steph;
and living in fear of what lurked in her basement OTHER than laundry
The high times with;
Jilly;
and the endless things we blew up in the vacant house next door
kaitlyn;
and the november talks and the banff blues
Allan;
and the addict twin raves in my then terrifying basement
Steven;
and the 4am politcal talks while drinkning tea and watching the punk show
and Kemo;
way back when we could barley say eachothers names.
these are what i miss most in life;
and whilst it saddens me i wont ever get those times back;
it makes me o so happy to no now just what i experienced.
<3
