I am a hat. A fedora, to be exact. I'm in charge of an army called the Armando Army.

Armando Army (ãr-mân-dõ ãr-mý) (P.n.)
1. A group of Canadians, mostly aged from 14-19, who believe that a fedora hat named Armando is in charge of them, and tells them what to do.
2. A pacifist army that is led by the infallible Gagootsi and Musicface and their hats.
3. A group of people who name their hats Armando and are extremely important.
4. The coolest people to ever walk the face of the earth.
5. To do with, or being, the Armando Army.
6. Someone in the Vancouver Island, GVRD, Okanogan, Calgary or Winnipeg branch of the Armando Army.
7. A hat in the Vancouver Island, GVRD, Okanogan, Calgary or Winnipeg branch of the Armando Army.
8. A sub-culture of Canadians.
9. Those who ascribe to 'Armandoism,' a religion that worships the hat of a 17 year old boy who lives in Vancouver, BC, Canada.

Armando Headcount:
GVRD Branch: 35
Surrey Branch: 7
Vancouver Island Branch: 6
Norway Branch: 5
Winnipeg Branch: 4
Pitt Meadows Branch: 1
Edmonton Branch: 1
Calgary Branch: 1
Austrailia Branch: 1
Coquitlam Branch: 1
Total: 62

These are my two human co-leaders:
"Musicface"
"Gagootsi"

WE ARE ALWAYS ACCEPTING NEW RECRUITS! In fact, NEW RECRUITS WILL POTENTIALLY BE GIVEN COOKIES!

The only rule to joining the Army: One must have a hat and he must be named Armando.
Everyone is welcome to apply to join the Army, but know that Armando reserves the right to refuse anyone with no reason given. Also, no-one living in the United States may be recruited at this time - we're waiting for a few more countries besides Canada to be given branches first, mostly because Americans usually get cool stuff first, and this time they won't.

GOALS OF THE ARMY:
-end world poverty
-eliminate capitalism
-ESTABLISH ARMANDO AS SUPREME DICTATOR OF THE WORLD!
-sentance all those ubiquitous pop-punk bands to death






UI





ALL IN THE ARMY ARE ENCOURAGED TO PUT SOMEWHERE IN THEIR NEXUS PROFILE THE FOLLOWING STATEMENT:
"Proud member of the Armando Army"

This may help the Army gain notoriety.

-Politicians
-People who think hats are inanimate
-Capitalism




The list below are people who have commited acts against Armando or members of the Army.
ARMANDO'S ENEMIES:
- Hitler. But he's been taken care of. PRAISE BE TO ARMANDO, WHO DEFEATED HIM!
- Attilla the Hun. Armando also got rid of him. So he's done with.
- George Bush. We're working on this one.

-~Outrageous~
Her crime is being unecessarily rude and hostile to the beloved Gagootsi. Her punishment is to have her page spammed, since apparently her time is extremely precious and hard-bought.