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BASICS

Height:	174 cm - 178 cm (5'9" - 5'10")
Weight:	92 Kg - 95 Kg (201 lbs - 210 lbs)
Birthday:	April 22, 1991
Sexual Orientation:	Heterosexual
Living Situation:	Living with roommate(s)
Location:	Lake Cowichan, British Columbia, Canada

INTERESTS

Reading Material:	Comic books, Graphic novels, Humor, Non-fiction, Sci-fi
Movies:	Action, Comedy, Documentaries, Horror, Science Fiction, Spy/Political Thrillers, Silent
Art:	Cartooning, Doodling, Photography, Song Writing, Writing
Animals/Pets:	Birds, Cats, Dogs, Farm Animals, Fish, Horses, Rabbits, Reptiles, Rodents
Video Games:	First person shooter, Fighting, Racing, Role Playing, Sports, Strategy
Cars:	Drag Racing, Drifting, Imports, Modifications, Offroad, Rally, Tuning, Classics, Motorbikes
Music:	Alternative, Blues, Classic Rock, Country, Death Metal, Drum & Bass, Garage, Hardcore, Indie, Jazz, Metal, Punk, Reggae, Rock, Techno, Trance, Acoustic
Sports:	Body Building, Boxing, Hiking, Hockey, Kickboxing, Martial Arts, Paintball, Rugby, Weight lifting, Motocross
Activities:	Cooking, Drinking, Driving, Gambling, Karaoke, Listening to music, Partying, Poker, Pool/Billiards, Reading, Shopping, Flailing
Musical Instruments:	Acoustic guitar, Bass guitar, Electric Guitar
Outdoor:	Camping, Going to the beach, Hunting, Hiking, Exploring, Sightseeing
Computers:	Instant Messaging

UNTITLED

This is history in the making.
Now shut the fuck up, and let me make it...

Hit me... I fucking dare you

Pessimism:
pes·si·mism [pes-uh-miz-uhm] Pronunciation
–noun 1. the tendency to see, anticipate, or emphasize only bad or undesirable outcomes, results, conditions, problems, etc.

"We killed a lot of innocent civilians.
To us every civilian in Baghdad was a terrorist.
They said 'they are now in civilian clothes' that makes everybody free game,
But if they came in our perimeter, we lit 'em up.
And when we would pull the body out, and when we would search the car, we would find nothing.
This took place time and time again. No harm, no foul, that's OK, don't worry about it,
Because this is a new type of war, this is an eradication."

"I honestly feel we're committing genocide over here,
I don't believe in killing civilians, and I'm not going to kill civilians for the United States Marine Corp."

[/color][/right]

Personality Type: FUCK OFF

UNTITLED

10 RESONS TO DATE A RUGBY PLAYER
1. We know how to hit in all the right ways.
2. Can anyone say spandex?
3. We always scream and yell.
4. Open to performing in groups.
5. We do it in 15 different positions.. repeatedly.
6. We don't stop till we score.
7. We're used to working with our hands.
8. Not only can we tap that, we hit that.....HARD!
9. We know when to ease up and when to push harder.
10. We know how to make you scream for more

Throw Some D's: A Look At Rich Boy.[/size]

Well, here we are again. I find myself catching sight of yet another absolutely horrible example of hip hop. It's just not fair. I want to move on to something fresh and new. Something that is a different flavor of horrible like Fall Out Boy or something. But the hip hop just stands out too much. When I saw this shit sandwhich, it gleamed with terrible. It gleamed in the only way a shit sandwhich can. How is that exactly? Let's ask Rich Boy.
I want to ease your way through this because I was unfortunate to hear it without warning. I'm guessing anyone who watches MTV has already seen it. I saw it on the internet, but I'm guessing it's all over MTV.
Anyhoozer, we're going to glide through this as the music video goes on.
It opens with Rich Boy shouting "GET MONEY! NEW MONEY! HAAAY!" as oh fuck rolls out my mouth. You can just feel how terrible this is already. Lyrics ahoy!
Quote:
Rich Boy Sellin' Crack Dope Ni**as Wanna Jack Shit Tight No Slack Just Bought
A Cadillac(Throw Some D's On Da Bitch!!)Just Bought A Cadillac(Throw Some D's
On Dat Bitch!!)Just Bought A Cadillac(Throw Some D's On Dat Bitch!!)
Now, thing you need to know about Rich Boy is he's got big ol' teef. So while he is laying down da rhymes, you can hear him slurp a little as saliva (PHAT ASS PLAYA saliva) builds up in his grill. I'm not sure if it effects his speech, all I know is he is incapable of making the "ah" sound that the letter A should. So the sentence of "Rich Boy Sellin' Crack Dope Ni**as Wanna Jick Shit Tight No Slick Just Bought Cadillick"
I googled cadillick until my mind bruised, but there is no make of car called Cadillick. I'll be damned.
The video starts out (of course) with Rich Boy in front of the camera acting cool while scenes of expensive cars flash by.
Now for those who do not know the act of "throwin d's" let me translate. Throwin' D's is slappin' on some Rims (preferably Dayton) on a vehicle. I understand that'd be hard to grasp when you break down the sentence.

Throw Some D's
On Dat Bitch!!

Translates to:

Throw Some Rims
On That Woman

Translates to:

Assault That Women
By Using Rims As A Projectile.

Have no fear, ladies. He's talkin' bout a Cadillick.
Quote:
"... Just Bought A
Cadillac Took It To Da Chop Shop Got Da Damn Top Dropped Two Coloured Flipped Flopped
Candy Red Lolipop Deres Some Hoes In Da parking 'lot Still Got My Glock Hott"

Notice how many times there SHOULD have been a Th in that chunk of rhymes. So he got his car souped up, color changed and he's sitting in the parking lot with a gun and some lollipops. Sounds like Rich Boy is finding some underage ladies to abduct, maybe kill with his hott glock. Lollipops supposedly make good bait when your sittin' in da parking 'lot of a Chuckie Cheese, you fucking perv. No wonder why you got your cars color changed when you're running from the cops for rape and homicide charges.

Quote:
New Money Motha Fucka Don't You See Da Tail Light Don't You See Da Big Chain Don't
You Da Big Rims Wonda Who Dey Hatin' On Lately Baby Its Him Candy Paint

........wow....If da BIG CHAYNE doesn't impress you, even if DA BIG RIMS or the TAIL LIGHT doesn't impress you, how about his sudden tourette's will. CANDY PAINT!

Quote:
Gator Skin
Seats Call Me Dun Dee,Up In Yo 'hood Im Da Fucka Dat You Wanna Be Ni**as Wish
Dey Could Feel Da Wood In My H3 Ridin' Wit No Tint So Motha-Fuckas No Its Me...

Ni**as wanna feel the wood in his H3? Wait...his hummer? What about your Cadillick, Rich Boy? Oh Rich Boy. You've just got so much money selling crick.

Speaking of which. This is Rich Boy's first single. His first fucking song. And he already has a 4 million plus budget music video on his first song because they know how much of a sucker America will consume out of this crap. Everyone wants to be Rich Boy (being the point of the song...I think.) Why? ....Rims? HELL YEAH, RIMS! Moving on.
When the chorus comes back up, everytime they say "THROW SOME D'S ON DAT BITCH" it shows a little girl for some uknown reason.
Look out, little girl! They're going to throw rims at you! Shyit Nigguh. Bitch don't be scratchin' da candy PAINT!

Now comes Polow Da Don, the guest rapper, with his fat rhymes.

Quote:
Ni**a I Neva Slip And Ya See I Neva Fall,Alot Of Hoes Give Me Dey Numba But See I Neva
Call O.G Style Look At A Ni**a Ball,Baby Afta We Hit Da Club Imma Hit Dem Draws Yea
Imma Brek You Off And Baby That Should Be All Every Bitch Should Have A Picture Of My
Dick On Dey Wall Polow Be The Shit Zone 4 Be The Click Yea Dis Fa My Dawgs
Yea Gangsters, Hustlas,Wankstas,Bustas (Wait A Minute Muthaficka)

As terrible as he is, he's better than Rich Boy. He gave the song a big right turn from putting on rims, sellin' crick, and lollipops, to having sex with women after taking the to da club. I have to say I'd like the idea of everyone having a picture of his dick on their walls. Why didn't I think of that? A picture of my dick for all the fans to hang on their walls?

More expensive cars, repetative chorus, and several D's thrown. Here comes Rich Boy's 3rd verse.

Quote:
Hit The Block On Some New 10 Thousand Dolla Wheels. Kinda Strange How I Feel,
Toucha Gator On My Wheel Got Peanut Butter Icecream Peter Pan Seats Just Gotta
Fresh Cut Now We Lookin For Them Freaks.

That's got to be the best rhyme ever to grace rap. I GOT PEANUT BUTTER ICE CREAM AND PETER PAN SEATS! Wow. Don't spill any peanut budda ice cream on your peter pan seats, then you'll really be ridin' dirty. Rich Boy has a new hair cut to search for some freaks. Either I'm right about him dodging those felonies with the toddlers, or he is head of Mutant Control. Mutant Control is important and I salute thee, Rich Boy Candy Paint.

Quote:
Take Her Bacc Yella Bitch Make Her Dropp
Dem Draws Show Her Howwa Ni**a Ball,Middle Finga To Da Law So Fuck Dem
Ni**as Tell Em' What Dey Wanna Do?Hatin On A Ni**a Cus My Next Skate 22's. When
I Pull Up Imma Park Right At Da Front Porch Lean In My Cup Got Purp In My Blunt.
Imma Real Pimp Bitch Im Not Playin' Like A Trick Just Bought A New 'lac Bout To Put Dem
Thangs On Dat Bitch!!!!!

So to end the song, he has a girl, inc which he sticks his middle finger in her. MUST BE CUZ UV DA RIMZ! The whole end of the song shoots you in the face with obvious when you realise that whole song can be summarized to

"I bought a cadillac. I put rims on it."

But they blindside you with their awesome variety.

"I bought a cadillac. I put rims on it. I also like to fingerbang women."
What an exciting conclusion. If you want to endure with me because you have not been intimidated by Rich Boy's pedophile like sweet toof, then you can find some videos on YouTube. Problem is it's a remix. But it's still got the lyrics.

...

Hello, my name is Jon Fraser. I am suffering from rare and deadly diseases, poor scores on final exams, lack of sexual activity, fear of being kidnapped and executed by anal electrocution, and guilt for not sending out 50 billion fucking forwards sent to me by people who actually believe that if you send them, that poor 6 year old girl in Arkansas with lung cancer brought on by second-hand smoke from the cigarettes smoked by the big bad men who kidnapped her and took pornographic pictures of
her for use on their child pornography web site will get 6 fucking
cents every time you send me the letter. Do you honestly believe
that Bill Gates is going to give you and everyone you send "his"
email to $1000?
How fucking stupid are you? Ooooh, looky here! If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I'll get laid by every Victoria's Secret model in the catalog! What a bunch of bullshit. So basically, this message is a big FUCK YOU to all the people out there who have nothing better to do than to send me stupid chain mail forwards.
Maybe the evil chain letter leprechauns will come into my apartmentand sodomize me in my sleep for not continuing the chain which was started by Jesus in 5 A.D. and was brought to this country by midgetpilgrims on the Mayflower and if it makes it to the year 2000, it'll be in the Guinness Book of World Records for longest continuous streak of blatant stupidity.

Fuck them. If you're going to forward something, at least send something mildly amusing. I've seen all the "send this to 50 of your closest friends, and this poor, wretched excuse for a human being will somehow receive a nickel from some "omniscient being" forwards about 90 times. I don't fucking care. Show a little intelligence and think
about what you're actually contributing to by sending out forwards.
Chances are it's your own unpopularity.

P.S. Please forward this to at least 50 of your best friends![/font][/color][/size]

I'm sure we'll have the immortal army of our kind by the time armeggedon comes... They will have no choice but to surrender, and bow to our feet.