Intoxicated
by Daina Jack

I sit ‘there’ now. I don’t know why. You’re going to be home soon. Why do I have to wait in ‘there’? Why can’t i wait in in the other room? I don’t want to wait here. This is boring. It was boring when you put me in ‘there’, it was boring two hours ago. It was boring twenty minutes ago and it... you’re here. Where were you? You smell funny again. I will hide this and continue later.

Owe. It hurts to write. I’m sorry if the page is stained. I didn’t mean to disobey you. I’m sorry. I don’t like the new clothes you bought me. You’re wrong, they don’t fit right. They’re itchy. They even look itchy, they are. I don’t want to wear those to school. No one else dresses like that. Why do i have to dress like that? I can hear you making noise. I will go make dinner now. I will make it right this time, i will. I’ll try my hardest, my very hardest. I will.

I’m sorry. It still wasn’t right. I didn’t mean to drop the pan. My hand was still soar. I know, i know. no excuses. I should be more careful. I’ve learnt my lesson. I won’t do it again. It hurts. I don’t like those funny smelling drinks that i give you all the time. They all look different, and smell different. But they still smell the same? Does that make sense? I don’t know. But you smell just like them. I don’t like that smell.

Why do i have to go to bed now? Why do you get to stay up? I Don’t like going to bed this early. Oh, you’re telling me to get you another drink.

It’s late, Why are you yelling? Oh. You’re out of one of your drinks. The drinks make you act so funny. Something broke? I will go see.

See, I didn’t drink any of your funny smelling water. I didn’t. You’re getting more now. You took my lunch money. I guess you forgot. Oh well, I will just ask Jenny or andy if I can have a cookie. Maybe Ms. Jannz will even give me an apple again! Oh no. That was wrong of me. I shouldn’t have said that. I can’t keep taking their food. I’m sorry. That was bad. I won’t say that out loud. I don’t want to go back in there.

No school today. That’s sad. Why do I miss school more than anyone else? I miss Jenny and Andy. I guess I will just have to wait until tomorrow. Maybe you’ll be feeling better and I’ll get to school on time. How come Jenny and Andy’s parents don’t let them come visit me? They get to visit other kids. How come I don’t get to visit other kids? I will go check on you.

The bathroom was really dirty. You’re sleeping now. I’m in ‘there’. I had to clean for a long time. Why are you so clumsy sometimes. I didn’t mean to get in your way. My shirt smells funny too now. It’s all wet. When I get out I will make sure to clean up both our messes. At least your sick is gone. My owie left a stain on the floor. It hurts a little. I can’t see if it stopped. I will check when you let me out of here.

No need to say sorry. I understand. The drinks make you funny, but you need them to make you feel better. Like I take my medicine, right? Just to feel better. I understand You’re feeling better now. You’re happy too. You don’t even smell funny either. My clothes are clean now, I think i was in there ALL night. Jenny and Andy are glad to see me. I’m glad to see them too. I missed them. Ms. Jannz said that she was glad I got here safe. You’re driving was straight. No one even honked at us! I think today will be a good day, even though you forgot that you took my lunch money. Oh well. Ms. Jannz said that since i missed treats day i can have my treat today, and Tommy gave me his Milk and Jamie made me take her fruit snack. I guess i do get to eat! I can’t wait to see you later! I like it when you don’t smell funny.

You smell funny. You’re acting funny too. Uh-oh. The people made us leave the restaurant. Why did you talk to them like that? Why did they say those things to you? What does 'drunk' mean? please slow down. This is dangerous. Please. There's something on the road. Are you even awake? Oh no! I love you momm-




“Ma’am. Are you all right? You’re intoxicated ma’am. Please stay calm. Every thing's going to be all right. Ma’am, I’m sorry. It seems that your daughter... she... she didn’t make it. We found this note though. It seems as though she’s been writing it for sometime now. This is the only piece we could recover. It seems she thought quite fondly of you, when you were sober. You know the saying ‘mother knows best’, ma’am? No, no, you’re right. You didn’t. Just breath. It seems that you have an alcohol problem. We’re going to get you help. You’re going to be all right. Please ma’am, please stop crying.”