Twilight
Stephanie Meyer.
pg.210-211
I stared at my hands twisting and untwisting my fingers and i finalloy spoke."well aside from the obvious,sometimes...
"I hesitadted. "I can't be sure ---- I don't know how to read minds -----
But sometimes it seems like your trying to say goodbye when you're saying something else."
that was the best i could sum up and the sensation of anguish that his words trigered in me at times.
"perceptive," he whispered. And there was anguish again, surfacing as he confirmed my fear. "thats exactly why you're wrong,
though," He began to explain but then his eyes narrowed. "What do you mean, "the obvious"?" "well Look at me"
I said, unnecessarily as he was already staring. "i'm obviously ordinary ----well, except for bad things like all the near death experiences and being so clumsy that i'm almost disabled. And look at you."
I waved my hand toward him and all his bewildering perfection. His brow creased angrily for a moment, then smoothed as his eyes took on a knowing look.
"i'll admit you're dead-on about the bad things" he chuckled blackly, "but you didn't hear what every human male in this school was thinking on your first day."
I blinked, astonished. "I don't believe it.....," I mummbled to myself.
"Trust me just this once ---- you are the opposite of ordinary."
My emmbarrassment was much stronger than my pleasure at the look that came into his eyes when he said this. I quickly reminded him of my original argument.
"But i'm not saying ggodbye," I pointed out. "don't you see? Thats what proves me right. I care the most, because if i can do it"
---- he shook his seeming to struggle with the thought ------
"If leaving is the right thing to do, then i'll hurt myself to keep from hurting you, to keep you safe."
I glared. "And don't you think i would do the same?" "you'd never have to make the choice"
New Moon
Stepenie Meyer
pg.509-510
" So what if i was dead?"
He stared at me dubiously for a long
moment before answering. "don't you remember
anything I told you before?"
"I remember everything that you told me."
Including the words that had negated all the rest.
He brushed the tip of his cool finger against my lower lip.
"Bells, you seem to be under a misapperhension."
He closed his eyes shaking his head back and forth with half a
smile on his beautiful face. It wasn't a happy smile "
I thought I'd explained it clearly before, Bella i can't live
in a world where you don't exsist."
"'I am..." My head swam as i looked for the appropriate word
"confused." That worked i couldn't make sense of anything he was saying. He stared deep into my eyes with his sincere,
earnest gaze. "I'm a good liar Bella I have to be."
I froze, my muscles locking down as if for impact. The fault line in my chest ripped; the pain of it took my breath away.
He shook my shoulder, trying to loosen my rigid pose.
" Let me finish! I'm a good liar, but still, For you to believe me so quickly."
he winced. " That was... Excrutiating." I waited still frozen.
" When we were in the forest, when i was telling you goodbye----"
I didn't allow myself to remember. I fought to keep myself in the present second only.
" You weren't going to let go," he whispered "
I could see that. I didn't want to do it---it felt like it would kill
me to do it--- but i knew that i couldn't convince you that i didn't
love you anymore, it would just take you that much longer to get on with your life.
I hoped that, if you thought i'd moved on, so would you."
" A clean Break," I whispered through unmoving lips.
"exactly. but i never imagined it would be so easy to do!
I though it would be next to immpossible---
that you would be so sure of the truth that i would have to lie through my teeth for hours to even plant the seed of doubt in your head.
I lied, and i'm sorry----sorry because i hurt you, sorry because it was a worthless effort.
Sorry that i couldn't protect you from what i am. I lied to save you, and it didn't work i'm Sorry.
"But how could you believe me? after all the thousands times i've told you I love you, How could let one word break your faith in me?"
Eclipse coming August 7 2007.
Stephanie Meyer.
pg.210-211
I stared at my hands twisting and untwisting my fingers and i finalloy spoke."well aside from the obvious,sometimes...
"I hesitadted. "I can't be sure ---- I don't know how to read minds -----
But sometimes it seems like your trying to say goodbye when you're saying something else."
that was the best i could sum up and the sensation of anguish that his words trigered in me at times.
"perceptive," he whispered. And there was anguish again, surfacing as he confirmed my fear. "thats exactly why you're wrong,
though," He began to explain but then his eyes narrowed. "What do you mean, "the obvious"?" "well Look at me"
I said, unnecessarily as he was already staring. "i'm obviously ordinary ----well, except for bad things like all the near death experiences and being so clumsy that i'm almost disabled. And look at you."
I waved my hand toward him and all his bewildering perfection. His brow creased angrily for a moment, then smoothed as his eyes took on a knowing look.
"i'll admit you're dead-on about the bad things" he chuckled blackly, "but you didn't hear what every human male in this school was thinking on your first day."
I blinked, astonished. "I don't believe it.....," I mummbled to myself.
"Trust me just this once ---- you are the opposite of ordinary."
My emmbarrassment was much stronger than my pleasure at the look that came into his eyes when he said this. I quickly reminded him of my original argument.
"But i'm not saying ggodbye," I pointed out. "don't you see? Thats what proves me right. I care the most, because if i can do it"
---- he shook his seeming to struggle with the thought ------
"If leaving is the right thing to do, then i'll hurt myself to keep from hurting you, to keep you safe."
I glared. "And don't you think i would do the same?" "you'd never have to make the choice"
New Moon
Stepenie Meyer
pg.509-510
" So what if i was dead?"
He stared at me dubiously for a long
moment before answering. "don't you remember
anything I told you before?"
"I remember everything that you told me."
Including the words that had negated all the rest.
He brushed the tip of his cool finger against my lower lip.
"Bells, you seem to be under a misapperhension."
He closed his eyes shaking his head back and forth with half a
smile on his beautiful face. It wasn't a happy smile "
I thought I'd explained it clearly before, Bella i can't live
in a world where you don't exsist."
"'I am..." My head swam as i looked for the appropriate word
"confused." That worked i couldn't make sense of anything he was saying. He stared deep into my eyes with his sincere,
earnest gaze. "I'm a good liar Bella I have to be."
I froze, my muscles locking down as if for impact. The fault line in my chest ripped; the pain of it took my breath away.
He shook my shoulder, trying to loosen my rigid pose.
" Let me finish! I'm a good liar, but still, For you to believe me so quickly."
he winced. " That was... Excrutiating." I waited still frozen.
" When we were in the forest, when i was telling you goodbye----"
I didn't allow myself to remember. I fought to keep myself in the present second only.
" You weren't going to let go," he whispered "
I could see that. I didn't want to do it---it felt like it would kill
me to do it--- but i knew that i couldn't convince you that i didn't
love you anymore, it would just take you that much longer to get on with your life.
I hoped that, if you thought i'd moved on, so would you."
" A clean Break," I whispered through unmoving lips.
"exactly. but i never imagined it would be so easy to do!
I though it would be next to immpossible---
that you would be so sure of the truth that i would have to lie through my teeth for hours to even plant the seed of doubt in your head.
I lied, and i'm sorry----sorry because i hurt you, sorry because it was a worthless effort.
Sorry that i couldn't protect you from what i am. I lied to save you, and it didn't work i'm Sorry.
"But how could you believe me? after all the thousands times i've told you I love you, How could let one word break your faith in me?"
Eclipse coming August 7 2007.
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