Dane Cook is the shit
Bitch stole my fish
10 Reasons to Date a Guitar Player
1. They keep going even though it hurts
2. They can play various positions
3. They no how to make the right sounds
4. They do it right or they dont do it at all
5. There used to working with there hands
6. They can tap to the beat
7. They no how to use both hands and there mouth at the same time
8. They no how to make you scream for more
9. There so pro they dont have to watch what there doing
10. There open to performing in groups
Learn Chinese in 5 minutes...(You MUST read them out loud)
>1) That's not right ................Sum Ting Wong
>2) Are you harboring a fugitive?.............Hu Yu Hai Ding
>3) See me ASAP...............................Kum Hia Nao
>4) Stupid Man ...............................Dum Fuk
>5) Small Horse ..............................Tai Ni Po Ni
>6) Did you go to the beach?.................Wai Yu So Tan
>7) I bumped into a coffee table.Ai Bang Mai Fa Kin ni
>8 ) I think you need a face lift .............Chin Tu Fat
>9) It's very dark in here ...................Wai So Dim
>10) I thought you were on a diet ......Wai Yu Mun Ching?
>11) This is a tow away zone .................No Pah King
>12) Our meeting is scheduled for next week..Wai Yu Kum Nao?
>13) Staying out of sight ....................Lie Ying Lo
>14) He's cleaning his automobile ............Wa Shing Ka
>15) Your body odor is offensive .............Yu Stin Ki Pu
>16) Great ...................................Fa Kin Su Pah
my phone
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Top 10 Reasons Why Lacrosse is Better Than Soccer
1. If you get hit in lacrosse and fall to the ground holding your shin and crying like a soccer player, you get your ass beat the next time you go on the floor.
2. Lacrosse doesn't have a rule for feigning injuries because we respect ourselves too much to try to fake an injury to get a goal.
3. The groupies for lacrosse players are females.
4. Lacrosse players don't don themselves with greasy, curly mullets.
5. We don't borrow our girlfriends and wives headbands to keep our flowing locks out of our faces.
6. When we score a goal, we don't take off our shirts, run around and look for a group hug or a dogpile. We definitely don't jump up and straddle each other.
7. After a lacrosse game, both teams drink beer together. After a Soccer game, players whine about how the ref lost the game for them.
8. In lacrosse, our fans don't chase down the refs and kill them.
9. Lacrosse players make junk for money if any at all, so you know they play for the love of the game and not the paycheck.
10. We don't have to wait four years to watch the Champions Cup.