50 THINGS THEY NEVER TOLD YOU ABOUT UNIVERSITY

1. Quarters are gold.
2. Two meals per day is the standard.
3. Road trip whenever possible.
4. Going to the mailbox was never an ego booster/breaker before.
5. You will begin to nap again.
6. Your bookstore bill will almost equal tuition.
7. Squirt guns = Stress relief.
8. Instant messenger becomes an addiction.
9. E-mail becomes your second language
10. University students throw paper airplanes too.
11. You never realized that so many people were smarter than you.
12. University football is the coolest thing on the planet.
13. Western Europe could be wiped out by a horrible plague and you
wouldn't know, but you can recite last week's re-run of hat 70's Show verbatim.
14. Cartoons are for all ages.
15. Disney movies are more than just classics.
16. You will never rent/buy more movies in your life.
17. No one is too old for video games.
18. Procrastination is an art form.
19. The SNOOZE button is more addicting than pot.
20. Thanks to DC++/Ares/Limewire, you will never listen to any of
your CDs ever again.
21. It never hurt so much to get sick.
22. The health service nurses are there because they couldn't make
it at a real hospital. Never, ever forget that.
23. Care packages are right up there with birthdays.
24. Campus is only clean for Family Weekend and Freshman
Orientation.
25. Nothing you want to register for will be open.
26. Classes... the later the better.
27. You are no longer thankful that the fire alarms are here to
protect you
28. Jeans may be worn as many times as the wearer desires.
29. The only time to dress up is when your jeans are dirty.
30. Showers become less important; sleep becomes more important.
31. Asleep by 2:30 am is an early night.
32. Creativity in the dining halls is KEY...
33. The freshman 15 is NOT a myth!!!
34. If it's snowing out, the only reason you will leave your room
is for food
35. Dishs smell after days of piling up.
36. Cereal makes a meal any time of the day.
37. You will eat anywhere that is a buffet.
38. You will eat anything that is free.
39. New additions to food groups: Pita Pit and pizza.
40. Stealing from the dining hall will become second nature.
41. ATM's are the devils advocate. ATM = Another Twenty Missing.
42. Keys have never been so important, yet you seem to lose them or
lock yourself out of the room even more
43. Duct tape heals all wounds.
44. If they say you can't have it in your dorm, they are just
kidding.
45. You will come to hate hallways/stairs with a passion.
46. You will begin to negotiate with God even if you have doubted
his existence in the past..."Please God, if you let me pass this
final, I'll never drink again!"
47. Pictures, posters, emails or anything else to cover the ugly
cell we live in will be transformed into wallpaper.
48. Everyone is only nice for the first week. After that, no matter
how nice you are, some people just won't smile back. Get used to
it.
49. You are never alone!
50. You realize university is the ideal life style, except for
those pesky classes.