can someone please build a time machine for me pretty please,
so i can go back to last september.
when i was dating one of my best friends,
and living with the other.
when i got to hang out with my 2 best college buds everyday.
when i had my dream vehicle,
and an awesome paying fun job.
i wasnt fighting with my parents.
i woke up everyday happy and just happy,
i miss happy soooo much.
i just want to be happy again.
70 confession questions
1. The phone rings. Who do you want it to be?
- I cross my fingers that it wont be for me
2. When shopping at the grocery store, do you return your cart?
- Everytime
3. In a social setting, are you more of a talker or a listener?
- Listener
4. Do you take compliments well?
- I like to think so
5. Do you enjoy Crosswords?
- Definatly. They are my favourite activity with Miss Heck
6. If abandoned alone in the wilderness, would you survive?
- For a while
7. Do you like to ride horses?
- No
8. Did you ever go to camp as a kid?
- Girl Guide camps
9. What was your favorite game as a kid?
- Tackle Ultimate Frisbee
12. Could you date someone with different religious beliefs than you?
- Yes, as long as they didnt try to push anything onto me
13. Do you like to hit on others or be hit on?
- Be hit on
14. Use three words to describe yourself?
- Unsensible, Caring, Childish
15. Do any sad songs make you cry?
- Not really
16. Are you continuing your education?
- Yes I am, half way done the diploma then its off to Austraia for the Bachelors
17. Do you know how to shoot a gun?
- Some guns
18. If your house were on fire, what would be the first thing you grabbed?
- Cd's, Pictures, and the dogs if the fire was blocking their doggie door
19. How often do you read books?
- depends on what else is going on in my life
20. Do you think more about the past, present or future?
- right now the past and the future, the present is boring as shit
21. What is your favorite children's book?
- Where the Wild things Are
22. What color are your eyes?
- hazel
23. How tall are you?
- 5'7 and three quarters
24. Where is your dream house located?
- River side of BowCresent
27. Have you ever taken pictures in a photo booth?
- IM obsessed with them
28. When was the last time you were at Olive Garden?
- ive gone once, it was a delicious gongshow
30. Where was the furthest place you traveled today?
- work
32. Do you like mustard?
- only on ham
33. Do you prefer to sleep or eat?
- sleep
34. Do you look like your mom or dad?
-mom
35. How long does it take you in the shower?
- depends on the issue of to shave my legs or not
36. Can you do the splits?
- not even close
37. What movie do you want to see right now?
- Bobby and Knocked up, oh and Grindhouse soooo bad
39. What did you do for Valentine’s?
- went to school
40. Do you think The Grudge was scary?
- havent seen it
42. Do you own a camera phone?
- yes
44. Was your mom a cheerleader?
- haha no way
45. What's the last letter of your middle name?
- E
How many hours of sleep do you get a night?
- 5-16
48. Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?
- not even close
49. What do you buy at the movies?
- Im a sneak candy in my suitcase of a purse kind of girl so in other words nothing
50. Do you know how to play poker?
- Yup
51.Do you wear your seatbelt?
- Always
52. Where do you sleep?
- Usually a Bed, no even that is a bit of a stretch of the truth, really anywhere
53. Anything big ever happen on your street?
- my street is an adventure everyday...theres even a gun stuck in the road about a block away, although i think they might have paved over it last summer
54. How many meals do you eat a day?
- 2
55. Is your tongue pierced?
- unfortunatly not yet
56. Do you always-read peoples blogs?
- always
58. Do you like funny or serious people better?
- funny inless they are annoyingly too funny in a pain in the ass all the time kind of way
59. Ever been to L.A.?
- Yup
60. Did you eat a cookie today?
- No but i had chips for lunch, and icecream for dinner, gosh im going to die young
61. Do you use cuss words in other languages?
-nope
62. Do you steal or pay for your music downloads?
- Pay, well technically steal, only not from the artists i stole them from rogers wireless
63. Do you hate chocolate?
- no i am currently having an affair with it, for i am currently married to icecream and biscuits
64. Favourite colour?
- Orange
65. Are you a gullible person?
- Yup
66. Do you need a boyfriend/girlfriend to be happy?
- Nope.
67. If you could have any job (assuming you have the skills) what would it be?
- Party Planner, Elementry school teacher, astranaut
68. Are you easy to get along with?
- YUp
69. Do you have those weird moments where you feel like dancing randomly?
- Yup i just dance a lot
70. What is your favorite time of day?
- 3 pm
Draft night isnt the same without all of Sheraline.
actually nothing is the same.
Frig i miss that girl so much.
He crosses my mind so many times in a day,
its impossible to make him go away.
and i cant help but wonder,
does he ever feel the same way?
life is too short.
too short for a lot of things.
but definatly too short for the love in it.
RIP Barry
RIP Nellie
RIP Steph
RIP Jeremy
RIP Reanna
RIP George
RIP Grandpa Mogg
RIP Grandpa Wilson
RIP Great Grandma
RIP Winnie the Pooh
RIP Grandma Wilson
RIP Black Diamond
RIP Grandma Mowat
RIP Elvis
too many people
leaving us too too fast
but the memories and the love live on
They will never leave my thoughts and my heart
May they rest in Peace.
Ten Random Things About Me
1. I have too many dreams for my own good
2. Driving is my #1 passion
3. I hate the smell of Ketchup
4. Numbers come naturally to me, it dosent mean i like math
5. If i dye my hair, i feel on top of the world
6. I miss Sherri more then i ever could have expected
7. Love is amazing, But the heartbreak still makes me regret it all
8. I know the worlds most amazing people
9. I will only make decisions that directly effect myself
10. The Boho was the funnest Bar ive ever stepped foot in
Nine Ways To Win My Heart
1. Buy me JBC's
2. Drive a Truck
3. Love Music
4. Have amazing Friends
5. Be Self-confident and follow dreams
6. Looks never hurt anyone
7. Wear Aviators and Wife-beaters
8. Let me meet the Family
9. Meet my Family
Eight Things I Want To Do Before I Die
1. Have a Kid
2. Drive a Zamboni
3. Start a Business
4. Get Laser Eye Surgery
5. Get up on the wakeboard
6. Pull a Fire alarm
7. Spend a night in Jail
8. Ollie over Something
Seven Ways To Annoy Me
1. Eat unnessicarily loud
2. Phone my cellphone a lot
3. Point out that i make up my own words a lot
4. Be hypocrytically needy
5. Depressed/Crying/Angry Drunks
6. Be a Couger and attack the guy I like so he leaves
7. Take advantage of intoxicated people including myself
Six Things I Need
1. Friends/Family
2. Boys
3. Kids
4. Sleep
5. Driving
6. Music
Five Things I`m Scared Of
1. Getting electricuted with things
2. Car Accidents
3. Getting too drunk and getting lost
4. Love
5. Horse Fly's
Four Favorite Things In My Room
1. The Invincible CD Player
2. My CD's
3. My Bed
4. My Locker
Three Things I Do Everyday
1. Sleep
2. Laugh
3. Absorb in some Music
Two Things I`ll Always Cherish
1. The Memories
2. The Present
One Confession I Must Make
1. They are probally the best thing to ever happen to me, and they will probally never understand that.
Im 19 now.
im trying really hard to be a new person.
im trying really hard to love the people i chose to spend my time with,
im trying really hard to not regret my past so much.
tie up some of the loose ends that haunt me each night,
say the things i wanted to say,
but make sure i mean them.
no more lies.
well only limited ones, im too good at it to give it up completly.
yes i realize that makes me an awful person.
but from now on if theres something i want to say i will say it,
if theres some where i want to be i will be there,
no more being scared.
and if theres something i dont want to do, or someone i dont want to say,
from now on i wont go.
i want to be proud of myself each day.
and happy with who i am.
19 is a new start with me.
the future is going to be bright,
and im going to fix the past so that its at least bearable.
but only the stuff that means something to me,
like really means something to my heart.
if something went bad in the past that i dont care about,
then its in the past.
but somethings are worth digging up again.
some friendships some people.
they can be worth everything.
so for those it will be honesty.
im tired of hating who i am.
im tired of hating what ive done.
im tired of hating what ive let go.
theres a boy i never gave a full chance and i regret it all the time,
theres a boy i did when i knew i shouldnt have and i regret that all the time,
and theres a boy i gave everything too, which i shouldnt have done either, because when he was gone, he took everything from me, and i lost our friendship in that too. i regret this every second.
these boys were all unique and special,
some might know who they are,
some might not have a clue.
but im in the process of attempting to gain some respect with them all again,
and maybe one day i will get a second chance at the friendships i fucked up.
regrets.
my short life is full of soo sooo sooooo many.
but thats over. its been 9 day of being 19
and its a whole new life.
hold on to your friendships,
watch your own back,
dont give away everything, unless you are given someone elses everything in return.
love lots,
love often.
i want to take this chance to thank a few people too.
just briefly.
sherri: thank you for being my other half, and knowing me better then i know myself somedays. thank you for being everything a best friend needs to be, and being my step into and from reality when needed. i love you more then you could know, and were going to be friends forever dont worry.
jeanette: thank you for sticking with me through so many thicks and thin. weve gone through so many changes, and friends, and events, and fades, and almost lives together. you feel more like family then a friend most days, and i love you to pieces. its been a long road, and we have a hell of a lot of a longer road ahead of us, so wanna be my buddy? we can link arms and skip through it all just like the old days.
cassandra: thank you for making me feel like no matter what happens someone will understand. this has been a hell 4 months, and ive spent a decent amount of time laughing through it just because youve been there with me. your definatly my partner in crime, and no matter what, we can tough through all this shit life will bring us, because we have each other.
gaby: thank you for making college the easiest adjustment i will probally ever have in my life. meeting you was probally one of the best things that could have happened to me, and im so thankful for it. we had some amazing adventures, and i couldnt have asked for anything more then to go into a scary new place and found someone who i loved being with. were the coolest people sait has ever and will ever see, even if were the only ones who realize it.
And even though they will never read this
ben: thank you for the limitless amount of amusing conversations and being the main connection between the two households. it was you that came back to the kegger that night and took us home, and because of that i know some of the worlds best people i swear. thank you for the warm bed to sleep in, and making sure i always feel so welcome. its like a second home to me now and that means the world.
daylan: thank you for your constant compliments that make me feel on top of the world. for watching my back when im a drunk mess, or getting threatened by some girl. for a bed when bens was occupied, but most of all for staying up for all hours in the morning when clearly you dont want to, just to keep me company always with a smile on your face. oh and for the pencil crayon blanket.
pascal: thank you for always going out of your way to make sure we are content. for offering to be my temporary bf and take the kicking if i hit the cans. for being constantly amusing with your work injurys, and pirate talk, and amazing sense of humour. and definatly not least, for trusting me to drive your car, because that means the world to me.
jay: thank you for being exclusive in our vip lounge at the kegger, and finding us interesting enough to talk to most of the night. for your i think they were chicken jokes, and your fight with sabrina. for keeping your side of the deal and going in the hot tub when i went in. for being my juggling buddy, and my foose buddy a lot of the time. we are a decent team.
mike: thanks for leaving your car and your friends to walk in the cold with me back, it was probally one of the most genuine sweetest things anyones done for me in a while
I want to kill him,
or myself.
Mostly him.
One of us might die before the end of this semester,
and it will probally be me by sticking a pen in his head.
I hate this boy more then i hate snow,
or cats, or hating things!!! probally more then ive ever hated anything in my life
