I went home and turned on friends and got drunk, laughed myself into a comma.

Does anybody even remember why they like this show? each week we are treated to idiotic stories and horrible acting and thats just in the opening credits, I mean tonight i am watching and just shitting my pants because I am so insulted, I mean they keep on insulting my intelligence with this we were on a break bullshit and the fighting really gets to me, one minute they're back together and the other they are at each others throats, then the sarcastic funny funny one realizes he isn't gay anymore and he falls in the love with the alcoholic neat freak and don't even get me started on the moronic hippy who can't carry a tune and the fucking doohbag "actor" who just can't get a beak yet has all this money?? like what the fuck... then after I was done having coffee with martin, sandra, hilary, chantel, colin and sean. stupid bastards!

Sometimes in a mans life he realizes he has to offend people and or make them giggle. Although I like giggling , I must contest that my soul purpose on this site is to give people a demonic view into my head and rain on their parade whenever I get the chance. Futhermore I would like to state that the thoughts and opinions stressed on this site are fictional and or stolen from actual witty and or funny person(s). My colleauges and I have come to the conclusion that the organization is a failure thus it must be elminated, now if your still reading this and are confused.. good! that is all for now.

Yeah I'm looking at you mr. or mrs. depressed, To me people who claim to be depressed on valentines day are just in it for attention. I mean valentines day is just another depressing day only on this day it commericalized to be something more then some day invented as an excuse for men to make to up for forgetting their anniversarys. I mean its not like people in relationships do anything different then normal days, I mean valentines day should be the complete opposite of any other day, the thing that should set it apart from any other is, bobbing for wedding rings then choking to death on your own self worth... oh man this entry was dark.

You can recite to me the entire movie script from the nightmare before christmas up to and including all the song and dance numbers. I mean todays goths are a joke and i bet you real witches laugh in the graves at todays "witches" too bad someone forgot to tell these clowns that 1567 is over. I mean I am no patron for society either but because you look demonic doesn't mean that your any different then the man who cleans peoples shoes for a living or acting skills of vin diesel. So in conclusion there is no such things as ghost, goths, witches, vampires, werewolves and micheal j. fox.

Come they keep letting paul walker make movies, I mean anybody who tells me this guy is good actor should maybe put their tounges back in their mouths because they think this guy is good looking. And thats another thing how come its ok for girls to just like movies because they think guys are hot, but if I guy makes a comment about a dames capital knockers he is pig? No its you Female who ever you are who is the pig! On the other hand I'm sure a movie full of ugly people wouldn't do good at the box office and would leave alot of people sick after seeing it but I mean if thats how you think movies should be viewed maybe you should go to a place that might suit you more.. lets say I dunno NAZI GERMANY.. cuz you know who else loved "perfect people" HITLER!!! still like paul walker??

download forgotten cartoons that nobody cares to admit they watched, I mean what was wrong with my little pony and rainbow brite? its not like they were aimed directly at girls. And even if they were I am here to say I do not care, I mean sometimes at night I dream that I am jem, or one of the holograms. Why am I telling you this, perhaps the next time you see memorabila that you think your niece, daughter or little girl you hope to manipulate until she is old enough to date you, you might stop and think what if Josh wants that?... cuz I tell ya. HE does

everytime i close my eyes, I escape in this world of delights unseen by the human eye and sitting in a corner with a bee bee gun. the flickers of a thousand images speratically spaced all throughout the black. feelings of pain, joy, warmth all take over your body, as i you were flaoting, waiting for a giant dragon to save your life. here he he comes and the laughter, music and peoples voices fill your hear, you are intoxicated with special abilities, only to......




realize you've fallen asleep watching american beauty after chugging a forty... Dad!!

Has the world gone completely mad!? instant everything these days, first it starts with oatmeal, then rice, macaroni,cameras, surgery, the list goes on. I mean come on people, whatever happened to the good ol' days of wasting time setting stuff up, cooking and stealing.. ok maybe stelaing is still around but come on. I mean soon enough you'll have instant bathrooms sewn into your pants.. the pure thought scares me, your in an elevator and good old roger starts doin his business while smiling at you. Anyways now on the real problem: People named ted. Don't ask me why. I just can't stand the way they stand, so stop standing ted.. I said stop it!!

So i was watching tv today around 2:21 in the morning and this odd commercial came on for disneyland vacations. what the hell? why go to disneyland pay lots of money to get turned down by girls younger then hilary duff. I mean I'd rather take a tour of dollywood. Anyways disney is so corporate now and in a way it always was, walt disney was a hitler supporter, thats scarey since I always thought mickey was jewish. I mean those little micky mouse hats remind me what my jewish friends wear on their heads. And the new president micheal issiner is a huge retard, he actually likes to remake the old corney movies, he even ok'd another eddie murphy disaster.. ugh the haunted mansion, it was no doctor do little and that movie was like being kicked in the junk with a high heel. what does all this ranting and raving do prove... that if you like your kneecaps fall face first.

Hi my name is Josh Masterberg. Each week I will be interviewing world trouble makers and wat nots, but today you will be totally happy and suprised. I mean I got to meet the man that the world hates well those on the right wing and anybody who was offended by 9-11. although I don't agree with the actions of this name, I do agree nobody wears rags like he does.
and now for the interview that changed the world.

Josh: hello
Osama: are you an american spy?
Josh: uh no (a couple of men jumped me and gave me a few victory shots to see if I was lying. after several hours in a hole, I awoke in my chair)
Osama: hi how are you?
Josh: snuh.......
Osama: did you ever watch transformers, bumblebee was my favorite, I love that llittle guy.
Josh: .. well personally I thought he was kinda gay
*after a another several hours of beatings*
Osama: you take more of a beating then the us troops in iraq
Josh: hey dirty pool mister.. us and british. geez get it right
Osama: hey do you want another beating? don't make me look stupid
Josh: sorry.. gee you live in a cave for 2 years, you seem to get bitchy
Osama: sorry I haven't had my coffee yet
Josh: whats your fav coffee?
Osama: Folgers? I love the commericals
(we sing the folgers theme.. only to be interupted by george bush returning to his house.. I mean cave... cut tape)

so there you have it folks, osama bin laden lives in a CAVE and not in george bush jr's HOUSE.

I looked outside today and nobody was there, maybe because they were sleeping, or maybe because they were aliens Whatever the case was, I was alarmed, the phone was too far away to call the police and I was naked so I didn't wanna get up. Its cold outside of the covers. Thats when it hit me man I really need to buy a slurpee... but thats another story.