Rules for being my MySpace/Facebook/Nexopia friend:
No liars (unless you are flirting)
No flaky people
No granny panties! (unless you are actually a grandma
No psycho stalker chicks! I don’t care how hot you think you are!
No BORING PEOPLE … You must be fun



Why I’m Still Single
Current mood: determined

People keep asking me why I am still single? After all I am:

An attractive Fellow
Confident in my own identity
Socially Savvy
Keep in great shape
Highly educated
Have many beautiful women in my life who I care about
Safe and Trustworthy
Often the center of attention (cause I’m a fun dork)
A rescuer of Orphaned sheep
Mysterious and Deep
Ambitious
Well traveled
Loved by Dolphins and various other woodland creatures
Successful
Pee your pants funny (but don’t please that’s gross)
Artistic
Romantic
Loyal, Compassionate, Optimistic, etc etc etc
The list goes on and on. Some of you may think I am being**** right now. Fair enough, I often have a tendency to be**** but it is always in a playful way. Trust me, I do not take myself THAT seriously. However, I have worked hard to be the person I have become and I continue to every day. I have committed to continually striving to become the absolute best I can be for me and for those I love.

So why am I still single? A friend of mine sent me over an application and one of the questions was as follows:

Fill in the blank: I like a girl that__________

Here was how I answered:
I like a girl that knows who she is, knows what she wants, is kind and compassionate but not weak, sassy and intelligent, knows when to say sorry and when to hold her ground, clever and sociable, outgoing with substance, secure with her body and sexuality, graceful and elegant, intuitive and curious, adventurous and dorky, beautiful beyond compare, crazy about me, knows how to please me in bed and always up for trying new things, a world class cuddler, supportive, has her own life and friends, picks up on subtle hints and comes up with great surprises, able to rough it, optimistic and devoid of complaint, flirty and flexible, knows how to prioritize her life, let’s go of the past and moves forward, takes time to figure herself out so she stops making the same mistakes over and over, in touch with her emotions but not overly emotional, creative, able to agree to disagree and acknowledge both sides of an argument, takes naughty pictures and sends them to me when we are apart, generous, fierce, will be a great mother when the time comes, takes care of her body for her, for me and for our future children, has a strong-healthy sex drive, solid in her identity but always open to new ideas to continue growing as a person, has nice round perky breasts with proportionately shaped nipples ( hey, I know what I want), makes excellent sex noises, has passion in her kisses, finds beauty in her surroundings no matter where she is, loves to travel, spontaneous, able to make her own decisions independent from what her friends and family think, takes risks, unwilling to settle for anything but the best in life (that’s me:) and over all is a kick ass awesome person.
So as you can see I am still single because that kind of woman is harder to find than a mermaid in the desert. Perhaps I have already met her, or she is in Finland and I will meet her on my next voyage around the world? Maybe she is reading this right now?* Who knows? But when she does find me I know she will appreciate how picky I am and all the work I’ve done in shaping the perfect man for her.

* If so stop reading this right now and get over here into my arms! hahahahahaha