Sports: Womanbeating, Wrestling
Musical Instruments: Lead Pipe
Movies: Lesbian

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**I silently pray at night that there will be some kind of excuse for me to kick some guy's ass tomorrow.**
Likes

Tabasco Sauce
Backyard Wrestling
Wifebeaters
Michael Jackson
Kickin' the shit out of some random wrestler




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WIFEBEATING AT IT'S FINEST!!!!






Dislikes

FEMINISTS! -Cause they are fucking sexist themselves.
Bill Fibish
Childish Fucks (good example is Brady Veltin)
Titty Twisters

The BADDEST man on the planet.



-Chuck Norris is the reason there are no white jokes. Everybody fears Chuck Norris.

-Chuck Norris doesn't win medals, medals win Chuck Norris.

-Chuck Norris is the only man who can lift the bed while he's on it.

-Chuck Norris is so strong, he can do chin ups without a bar.

-If you want a list of Chuck Norris’ enemies, just check the extinct species list.

-Chuck Norris has bigger pecks than a woman.

-Chuck Norris can outrun Serina and Jen with both legs amputated.

-When Serina and Jen are constapated, doctors just send Chuck Norris to their place to scare the shit outta them.

-Chuck Norris owns the greatest poker face of all time. It helped him win the 1983 world series of poker despite him holding just a joker, a 2 of clubs, a 7 of spades, and a green number 4 from Uno and a monopoly ‘get out of jail free’ card.

-Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.

-Chuck Norris frequently signs up for beginner karate classes, just so he can "accidentally" beat the shit out of little kids.

-Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.

-When Chuck Norris had surgery, the anesthesia was applied to the doctors.

-A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.

-Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.

-Chuck Norris does not use spell check. If he happens to misspell a word, Oxford will simply change the actual spelling of it.

-Chuck Norris invented a language that incorporates karate and roundhouse kicks. So next time Chuck Norris is kicking your ass, don’t be offended or hurt, he may be just trying to tell you he likes your hat.

-Some kids piss their name in the snow. Chuck Norris can piss his name into concrete.

-Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd; no one fools Chuck Norris.

-Jeeves asks Chuck Norris.

-Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.

-Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting implies the possibility of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.

-Chuck Norris was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.

-Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

-When Chuck Norris gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.

-Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Chuck Norris' PC will crash.

-Chuck Norris' dog is trained to pick up his own poop because Chuck Norris will not take shit from anyone.

-Giraffes were created when Chuck Norris uppercutted a horse.

-Chuck Norris plays russian roulette with a fully loded revolver... and wins.

-Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

-Rosa Parks refused to get out of her seat because she was saving it for Chuck Norris.




*sigh..* If only Canada had the balls to go ask Chuck Norris if he wanted to hunt down Osama Bin Laden..