KissesLikeCandy - 22, Female, Alberta
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<3
i miss my BlairBear when he works overtime!
cannot wait for you to get home!

 

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it has been a long while...
i miss blogging. i bet it misses me too! :)
 

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2010
i have had some shitty years, but this one takes the cake.
and only 22 days in...
it is going to be a LONG year
full of stress, family drama, and a bunch of random bullshit.
on the bright side,
i don't think there is anything possibly left to surprise me!
the most unbelievable, has already happened.
 

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[New Name]
not that ANYONE will even bother to read this,
but i'm officially going by Mika now.
 

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rant.
you are the most ignorant, selfish jerks i have ever had the misfortune of meeting.
take a few seconds out of your fucking life and think about your family.
your family has done nothing but help you through your entire life,
and now you've lost that. and you have definately lost me.
if you think you can turn to me for anything anymore, you are sadly mistaken.

 

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Rest In Peace Audrey
this never should have happened.
i've known you nearly my whole life
and i will NEVER forget you.
 

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Congrats
you ruined everything with me,
just like you do with everyone.
good job with that.
 

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ten people!
Name them (Odds same sex, evens opposite)

(01) Manda
(02) Trevor
(03) Sam
(04) Dean
(05) Victoria
(06) Dexter
(07) Lysia
(08) Sabby
(09) Adrienne
(10) Spencer

Couples: good or bad?
(4) and (7) = Dean and Lysia – not going to work out lol
(1) and (10) = Manda and Spencer – he is kinda married
(3) and (8) = Sam and Sabby – lol no
(2) and (5) = Trevor and Victoria – she’s a little young!
(6) and (9) = Dexter and Adriennce – she’s even younger!
(1) and (2) = Manda and Trevor – been there, tried that
(5) and (10) = Victoria and Spencer – again, age issue
(3) and (6) = Sam and Dexter – maybe if she was single
(7) and (8) = Lysia and Sabby – yea....nope

One - Manda
:1: Do you have lots of photos of them? tons
:2: Do they hate spiders? Not at all
:3: What's so good about their personality? Everything!
:4: If they were stranded on a desert island, which band would be with them? She wouldn’t care
:5: What colour's their bedroom? White?
:6: What did they get you for your last birthday? Cutest card ever!
:7: Do they play an instrument? No she does not lol
:8: Can you read their handwriting? yes
:9: What's their favourite dessert? Cheesecake?
:10 Do they wear glasses / contacts? She is supposed too!
:11: Who is their significant other? Non existant
:12: What's that quirk about them that makes them so speical? ...soo many...
:13: What do they normally wear? Comft clothes
:14: Rate their hugs on a scale of 1-10, 10 being the best? 10, duh
:15: Do you see this person as your sibling? She practically is

Two - Trevor
:1: Does this person have a significant other? Yes!
:2: Is it you?
:3: Are most of their friends the opposite sex to them? I think so
:4: What do you love most about them? Everything! He’s amazing!
:5: Are they the first person you cry to? Naww
:6: Is this person more funny or serious? Good mixture
:7: Do they have myspace? ...i have no idea
:8: If they asked you to run away with them, would you? Sure!
:9: Are you physically attracted to them? yes
:10: What smiley do they overuse on IM? None?
:11: Are they tanned? I dont think so
:12: Do they often get drunk? Im sure he does
:13: Have you met their parents? Lol no
:14: How often do you hug them? Not as often as id like!
:15: How far have you gone with them? lol

Three - Sam
:1: Have you seen this person in the past week? nope
:2: What do you think of their current hairstyle? Cute!
:3: What was the last thing you fell out over? Probby something stupid
:4: Does this person speak before they think? Don’t know anymore
:5: How much do you tell this person? Used to tell her everything
:6: How did you guys become friends? Cousins! We had to be friends lol
:7: Have they had many girl/boyfriends? yea
:8: Do they have ketchup with their fries? Noooo i think she hates it
:9: If they were going to dye their hair, what colour would they get? Multi color?
10: Do they eat soup? Im sure she does
:11: Would you trust this person with your life? Yes
:12: Can this person be aggressive? Yes
:13: Do you think they're photogenic? very
:14: From the opposite sex's point of view, are they hot? Im sure she is

Four- Dean
:1: What's the best thing about their personality? Besides everything?
:2: If they kissed you, how would you react? Major blushing?
:3: What's the last thing you did together? Walked lol
:4: Have you ever felt anything more than friendship for them? naww
:5: When they're upset, how do they treat you? He’s a sweetheart
:6: Do they have pets? Not yet
:7: Can they speak any other languages than English? I don’t think so!
:8: How old were they when you met? 23
:9: What colour are they normally wearing? Red
:10: You guys go to dinner. Who pays? He did the one time we went
:11: Do they play guitar? He sure does
:12: How do their hugs rate on the 1-10 scale, 10 being the best? 10!
:13: Have you ever told a lie for them? nope
:14: What's their best physical trait? His Eyes
:15: What's your best memory with them? Movie night

Five - Victoria
:1: What song reminds you of this person? So many bad songs
:2: If you guys went to a concert, what band would you see? Someone i hate!
:3: Do they drink coffee? yes
:4: What's their favourite ice cream? ...no idea
:5: Have they ever had a crush on someone on your top 10? I higly, HIGHLY doubt it
:7: Are they easy to get along with? Yes
:8: Do you love them as a friend? And as a cousin
:9: What are they likely to be doing right now? school
:10: Do you guys hang out often? Live pretty far away
:11: Are they likely to fill in this survey after you? nope
:12: If they were famous, what would it be for? Probably singing
:13: How long have you know each other? Since she was born
:14: What's their best subject? Couldn’t tell you
:15: Are they a good artist? I don’t think so?

Six - Dexter
:1: Are they one of those people's who's ALWAYS on IM? He is NEVER online
:2: Have you guys dated in the past? yes
:3: Would you ever consider it? Again? I don’t think so
:4: Have they ever done hard drugs? He is very against drugs
:5: How often do you see them? Almost daily
:6: Have they hurt you before? Not really
:7: Do you have a song that reminds you of them? Some really weird one
:8: Have you guys ever been on a summer camp together? Nope
:9: Under any circumstance, would you kiss them? I don’t know
10: What makes them unique? His attitude!
:11: What was the last thing you saw them eat? no idea lol
:12: When will you next see them? After work
:13: Have you ever stayed over at their house? yes
:14: Are they scared of the dark? nope
:15: What's the best thing about him, physically? Pretty much everything lol

Seven- Lysia
:1: What's their sign? Cancer
:2: Where was the last place you guys hung out? Park
:3: Can they play piano? nope
:4: Do you have a lot of photos of them? nope
:5: Do they exercise? Yes
:6: Are they an introvert or an extrovert? Hmm i don’t know
:7: Describe their handwriting? Suuuuper messy
:8: Have they got a job? I think so
:9: Are they shorter than you? Gosh no...like a foot taller almost
:10: What's their voice like? Pretty deep lol
:11: Is their anything about them that really annoys you? Her whistling!
:12: What sort of music do they like? techno
:13: Have you been to their house? Not since she moved
:14: What do they have on their toast? Pfft i don’t know
:15: Do they have siblings? She has 3 sisters

Eight - Sabby
:1: Does this person have pretty eyes? GORGEOUS
:2: Why are they your friend? yes
:3: Rate their hugs on the 1-10 scale (10 being good) :10 of course...again lol
:4: Have you met their parents? nopse
:5: What was your first conversation with them about? Coke vs pepsi lol
:6: How far have you gone with this person? Oh woow
:7: What kind of music do they listen to? Weird stuff
:8: How often do you talk? Most days
:9: Have they ever made you cry? Not yet lol
:10: What's your best memory with them? When we met
:11: What song reminds you of them? Don’t know the title
:12: If this person was on the run from the cops, what would you do? laugh
:13: Do you love them? As a friend
:14; Can they trust you? yes
:15: How much do you trust them? A lot

Nine - Adrienne
:1: Does this person have a bebo account? I doubt it
:2: Where did you meet? I don’t know, her house?
:3: When did you last go to their house? summer
:4: Do you think they'll be happily married? She’s a little young to think about that now
:5: Do you text this person a lot? never
:6: Do you even have their phone number? I think so
:7: Are they popular with the opposite sex? I don’t know?
:8: What's the best thing about their personality? passion
:9: Do they read Harry Potter? No idea
:10: What's their favourite colour? yellow? Or green?
:11: They're trapped on a desert island. What object do they have with them? A pet
:12: Do/Did you go to school together? Nope
:13: Are they life and soul of the party? She is only 13 lol
:14: What sort of movies do they like? animal
:15: Is their house always tidy? Maybe? lol

Ten - Spencer
:1: Are you guys in a club/organization together? nope
:2: Ever considered making out with this person? Been there, done that
:3: What's their personality? random
:4: Do you worry about them a lot ? Nope
:5: Rate their hugs on the 1-10 scale: 10
:6: Do they play guitar ? he plays everything
:7: In what way do you love them (if you do)? as a friend
:8: Do they have your cell phone number? yes
:9: Do you know where they live? yes
:10: How would your parents react if you were together? meh
:11: What makes them special? Everything lol, he is a special kid
:12: Do you miss them right now? I do!
:13: Have you ever hurt them, deliberately or not? naw
:14: What would you do if they were crying? Hugs!
:15: When you met, did you hit it off straight away? yes

Who's the...
Cutest? Adrienne
Prettiest? Manda
Most outgoing? Sabby
Blondest? Literally none...otherwise Victoria lol
Deepest? Hmmm Dexter?
Kindest? Dean
Most patient? Dean
Tallest? Spencer
Shyest? Adrienne
One you'd marry if forced? Manda lol
Best singer? Dean!
Preppiest? Uhm...Victoria?
Smartest? Sam?
Most daring? Sabby
Best friend? Manda

 

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let every failure be remembered
and every triumph forgotten;

it never gets easier.
i'll never understand,
or agree with how it works.
but i see the pattern,
so i expect it.

next time you need an ego boost,
don't come running to me.
 

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hahaha!
Kyle says:
imma randomly tickle you for shits and giggles sometime..just so you know
 

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and in the end you thought you won;
caught somewhere between life and death
no where to turn, the tears start to burn,
my face is a mess;
i've been searching my whole life,
and you were the one i found,
now im just the girl,
that death left behind.
 

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three days.
three days until everything becomes clear;
three days until the hardest decisions need to be made;
three days until i find out...
 

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(L)
You make me smile like the sun
Fall out of bed sing like bird
Dizzy in my head spin like a record
Crazy on a Sunday night
You make me dance like a fool
Forget how to breathe
Shine like gold buzz like a bee
Just the thought of you can drive me wild
Ohh you make me smile
 

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in the end, i lost a good one.
we spend our whole lives growing up.
working to achieve goals that will give us successful careers,
maintaining a healthly lifestyle,
studying to become the best we can be.
some people have their whole future planned out,
and i give them props.
but what about us people who might not have a future?
those of us who have been working so hard to get somewhere,
then finding out we will never make it.
those of us who just seem to be rejected from the world
-how does this even make sense?
we don't plan to die,
death plans to take us.
it needs no reason, no explanation.

life evaluation time:
throughout everything i have had to go through,
every battle ive lost,
every hit ive taken,
every comment ive heard,
it has still been a good one.
sometimes it takes a little bad news to appreciate what you have.
now all we can do is hope.

 

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well what do you know!
14 years later,
and its like i don't even know you.
 

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