So three years of intramurals to win, and we finally did. Maybe not on the A side, but we fought hard and we all got our tshirts we wanted to bad!

Thanks to everyone for showing up and putting their all into it!

Now its time for Red Eye!

So the first game of inner tube water polo was yesterday. Didnt go too well...but alas, we can recover. Everyone puts a ton of effort into it, and thats all I can ask. It was a blast either way!

Time for myself is needed. Please understand.

What truly makes one happy? Is it scoring a goal, hitting a ball, acing an exam, kissing a boy...Sure all these things are great and definitely get the heart racing...but for how long? I used to think that being happy meant trying to be nice to everyone and feeling good about yourself...and sure, I still think that they are important...but does lying to yourself or keeping things inside really make you a better person?

I ahve been through a great deal of friends, with few fights and lots of laughing...but I was never truly happy. There was things I wanted to talk about, and I felt more like a listener than anything. Settling for this is not what I owed myself, or anyone around me. If I wasnt happy, how could I be a friend? Right now, I have reached a point in my life, early or not, that everything is pretty much there now. I am happy, and not because of the little things, or the smile I put on my face. I think the things that make your truly happy are honesty and confidence in yourself, and in those close to you. I can truly say that every single person that I consider close to me I trust with no hesitation. I can say what I think and listen to advice or even give my advice, and not feel like I am going over the limits or fear of losing any of them. I may not have many close and dear friends, but to truly give your whole heart to each of them doesnt require a lot. I actually recently opened up a lot to one of them, and she didnt judge me or look down on me. Instead she was happy to hear it, and it made me realize that it is the people around me that make me happiest. No one is alone in this world, and if your find yourself feeling that way with whoever around you, maybe its time to think about what you want and how you want to feel. Nothing beats love, and love can beat anything if you let it. I have had my guard up for so long, protecting my feelings and myself that I don't think I have ever let anyone in to feel happiness. Not until now, that is.

Its not about having a lot of fights or letting every single thing you think out, no matter how hurtful. Its baout knowing when to let go, and when to hold on. When to open up, and when to listen. I love all my friends and family, and I really have nothing to hide. Kissing and telling may not be something people want to do, but if done in the right way, opening up about how you are feeling and hwere you are in your life, or relationship, can do wonders for your heart and your happiness. Id love to shout from the rooftops how I feel, and share every detail with whoever wants to listen...not out of disrespect, but out of pride, and that good feeling I feel down to my toes every morning I wake up.

Now who wouldnt want to share that?

I love you all, and your know who your are!

Hmm...wuts new and exciting...well, I am doing some new work in the lab...but thats not really speakable with many of you bloggers unless u have some university history in genetics, and even if u did...no one really cares until the final result is achieved...so, wut else...

Game 7 tonight, and my game, goodness, just cant get a break...oh well...

So...wut else...nothing really...life is good again. For a while it kinda went low, and for a spin, and pretty bad with lots of thinking...but now, its right back up, and actually, a whole lot better i think...

so...ya...

So...I am having a very difficult time right now...never fails that the bday always brings up some crap...but Im just tired of feeling pulled, guilty, confused, and tired. Sure, this sounds familiar, and God knows I am really happy, but goodness, who woulda thought relationships were this much work...WOW! lol...I love the drama, and everything else that goes with it...but I just cant take it sometimes...I mean, dont get me wrong, men are amazing and well, they certainly pull at the heartstrings like no one else...but why must they always need so much attention...I cant say I dont ask for it, or want to be with them when Im not, but sometimes a girl just needs her own space, and BAM, then questions start arising as if its there fault or wut not...

AND THEN they do something so sweet that u blame yourself for ever thinking otherwise...

Man oh man...I need some ice cream...

Ok..so school is coming to an end, with only finals left...and job starting right away, with ball still coming out of my ears. Between my own practices and Belles, it is intense, and to be quite honest, I underestimated the work load. When I dont have a Belles touni, I have my own, so May and June weekends are pretty much all booked, going into the middle of July. Belles games on Monday and Wednesday nights, and mine on any other night, with one night off to recover and then back at er...I guess time is precious, and so Ill take what I can with the time I have left...although sleep will prob be at the top of my order...So basically, to those of u that i see quite often, I am sorry if my time is limited. Shauna, I will still see u lots being on the same ball team and all, and hopefully sarah and greg and kason can make it to some games and tournis...but if ball makes u bored to tears...forgive me, and Ill see u in a couple months.

I do look forward to the summer tho, and everything it brings...

Ok, so just thought id write an updated version while I have some time...

Why is it that these things are usually sad...I usually write things out that I am thinking, and they are usually crappy things...truth is, I wouldnt trade any feeling, any issue, any person, anything for something else. Ill take it, all of it, learn from it, and move on, and look back and htink how lucky I am to be where I am, and to have what I have. A supportive family that is always there for me even if Im barely around for them...its just...so awesome. And friends who unload issues on me and who listen to me unload on them...I love it. And an amazing boyfriend who is there for me, whenever I need it, and who puts anyone else ahead of him, just to make everyone else happy. All of these people are a blessing to me, and I should stop pitying myself, and starting being grateful and thankful for everything and everyone. I am lucky enough to be involved with recreation to the extent I am...with 2 awesome teams, and be in school with a brain that I can deal with most times...and lucky enough to be given all the activities and pluses I get in between. I am spoiled, and trusted, and loved, and well, what more could anyone ask for? Issues...bah, they crumble when you have everything I do, and now, with God inside my heart in things I do and feel, I couldnt ask for anything else. I will live this life to the best of my abilities, and not take advantage of anything or anyone again, and that I vow.

In other words...

Have you ever felt just...well...pulled in so many directions that you dont know where to go. Everything is important to you, its in own special way, and some things definitely get overlooked compared to others...and the ones in between are overlooked. With so many committments, it gets pretty difficult fitting them all in, and although it is not worth complaining because things could be soooo much worse, there are days it just builds up so much you dont know wut to do with yourself. Its those days when people tell you that they are being neglected, or that certain areas of your life suffer because u didnt give your all into them that u realize how bad you are at managing things. Family and friends are obviously super important, but unfortuently, because they dont stick into your face and give you deadlines, you end up neglecting them the most...and I feel horrible about it. If I could only be more managed, and be better at setting limits for myself, it may be easier, but who wants to be with someone who continues checking their watch to make sure they havent gone over the limit. I just wish there was some way that I could really tell everyone and everything that as much as I love them, I just cant give it all all the time...I will try to separate my time, but somethings never seem to end, like school, and others are just getting started, like ball...I know its not going to let up, but sometimes, one just wants to fall apart, and take space to themselves to unwind...unfortunetly, if that happens, then something else is missed, and guilt takes its course right away. Alcohol is the obvious option to forget everything, but it doesnt keep it away, and in the end, u just feel bad for ruining yet another night that something else could be happening. Having a life is great, its just hard to manage one....so yet, I am sorry to those of you who feel neglected, and thats the last thing I want. If you want to talk, I would really love to, and I will do my best to give u my full attention, just know, that I am not always there all the time, as much as I want to be, and that I dont mean to hurt anyone. In the end, I am hurting myself, I know, and I also know I shoul dprobably drop some of these things, but its just not in me to quit, and so, I will hold on, suck it up, stop complaining, and get on with my life. I just hope everyone knows how much things and people do mean to me, and that I never want to take advantage of that.

So, today Ive come to a very important conclusion...one that most of u should know...I just dont know. Yes.,...thats the conclusion. I try to help and give advice or support, but in the end, it is really worth nothing and people should just follow their own hearts...I cant tell what I am feeling in the best of times, and thinking about my issues makes my head hurt...so I go to everyone elses issues, but, as I found last night, I am not the best person to deal with that either. I mean, if I dont know what I really want, how can I help anyone else out? I just end up frustrated, and sending mixed messages, and well, winding up at the bottom, hurting other people... So next time anyone needs advice on things that I dont know anything on...well, i can listen, but just may not be much help...

So...the Hockey pool starts Wednesday, and hopefully you all got your team in...
www.fantasygames.sportingnews.com

Its crucial to put your team in the leagues:

The Great ones!
Or/and
Inner City Street League password: kimberley

Good luck!

Dodgeball also starts Wednesday if anyone at university is interested.

Banff in FIVE!! YAY!! Its gonna be a blast, too bad lots of you cant make it, but well make sure to drink tons and swim and ski enough for u!

Ok ok...so I heard the greatest song ever today, it was, wow!! LIke I got goosebumps...serious ones!! Ive told lots of you that I find low voices sexy...oh my goodness, so this song, To be your man, by Josh Turner...WOW!! I saw the video on Friday, but then heard it on thr radio on the way home...and oh my goodness...I actually got flushed...which doesnt take much, I know...but it was just so amazing...alright, I just had to share...so make sure all of your check out that song!! I do have good taste, and if any of your guys want to win a girl's heart...for say Vday or just cuz you have a crush on her...sing that song!! Its really low, so no cracking problems...and I swear, it is just so....MMMMM!! Hit the soul right where it counts...

(Oh, and theres another good one in case u like the love songs which i have been relishing lately...by Billy Currington, Must be doing something right....its awesome too!! Not aas low, but just mmmm, SEXY!!

Ok, just had to share! Hope you are enjoying the superbowl...and Go HIT OR SINK!!

Where was the moment we needed the most?
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost.

You tell me your blue skies fade to grey,and you tell me your passions gone away, and I dont need no carryin on...

Tell me your lifes been way off line...Im falling to pieces everytime...and I dont need not carrying on...

Cuz I had a bad day...takin one down, sing a sad song just to turn it around, u say u dont know, but tell me dont lie....u work on a smile and ya go for a ride...u had a bad day the camera dont lie, ya coming back down, and ya really dont mind.....I had a bad day....

Sometimes the system goes on the bling and the whole thing turns out wrong, you might not make it back and u know u cant be all that strong...and Im not wrong...

cuz I had a bad day...

So! We got a serious game next week for all the marbles...money...or the tshirt, you could say. It will definitely be a tough game playing against a competitive team for the championship, but effort is all I ask, and we can do that...of course, getting this far I wouldnt mind going a little further and taking it home. So, for all your inner tube water polo fans...and by fans I mean Sarah... , I look forward to giving you a good game, and go TEAM!!

Hit of Sink will rise to the challenge!!

We won... we won...we won... Semi finals that is!