My only thing to say here is if you learn nothing from me ever learn this, we have only one shot at each day in life so live to the fullest, don't just exist, live!! Take chances, take risks, get hurt, get up and try again. Live to the absolute max so that you'll have no regrets when you look back on your life. As a friend of mine would say, "Have a rocking good time and we'll be ballin outta control" (Tashina)

However also learn the other side of the coin, no matter what, life sucks. It does. Life is horrible it blows it screws you over. All the blood, sweat, and tears to achieve, in the end like a cruel joke, death. Life "sucks Doug's goat ass" (Doug). The sooner you realize it, the sooner you realize that there is no perfect happy existence and it's going to suck forever, once you accept that life really does suck Doug's goat ass, you can move on and enjoy the other parts of life.


I work full time at the Scotford Refinery, took me a year at NAIT but was well worth it incredibly good paying job. I go to as many raves as I can without killing myself! Ditto for concerts!! Play some video games to pass the time. See tons of movies.....

OOO GOT A CAR FINALLY YAY!! !!!
That's about all!






If someone would have told me
that in 5 years I would be the person I am today,
I would dress this way,
Talk this way,
Have these friends,
Live the experiences I have,
Fought the battles that came my way,
Felt the hurt buried inside,
Experienced complete lonliness like I do,
Cherised the memories that remain forever,
Buried the pain deep within,
Lost those I thought would be there,
Found loyalty I thought non-existant,
Know the things I do,
Realize the truth's laid out before me,
Cried, laughed, screamed, and then moved on
I would have laughed
I would have told them they were crazy
And yet now I look and see that it was always me who was the crazy one.

Basically saying that I'm not who I thought i'd be or planned to be. No one ever is. So if your changing or your views/looks/ideals change.. go with it don't fight it. As for me, I have problems with self-esteem sometimes I'm told, but really to me it's just that I'm not used to compliments in any form. I'm used to be the underdog, looked down on, laughed at, abused, told that I'm worthless. But I'm still here on my own fighting like everyone else to live in this world. And I bounce back everytime!! I don't ever care what people think or say about me anymore, good or bad, it is of no consequence. What matter's is how I look on me. If you sit through life worrying about what other's may think of you, if you try and keep everyone happy, if you live your life for others, happiness will be elusive until the realization hit's that life is lived for each person on their own, you make the best with what you have and with those you surround yourself.


Alrite alrite no stereotypes, sigh take away all my fun.
I am first of all CANADIAN! So deal with that however you may.
I consider myself very easy going and open on most topics.
I love to have fun, will try almost anything, very individualistic and expressive.
I can be incredibly spontaneous and compulsive, OCD anyone? *laugh*
However on a down side I am incredibly stubborn I will fight tooth and nail for what I believe in or on a topic that I know i'm right on.
I will also defend my friend's and family before anything, can't generally annoy me from saying shit about me, however go against my friend's and my aggressive side comes out.
Definitly practical yet quirky.
Good sense of humor, love to be joking around and making people laugh.
I also thrive on competition the harder it is the more i'll try.
I try not to judge anyone so if you catch me doing so, yell at me!


High school grad w00t go me!! I win!
Did two years of university at TKUC (First year Comp Sci, Second year Business).
Decided that really wasn't the route to go. Went to NAIT for a year and have my 4th class Power Engineering Cert.


I was adopted .. my original name was Joshua Dean Berard!
So if you know him, er me, er of him, me, ahhh whatever. Then maybe you know my bio (not bi biO) mommy. And and and and .. and then.. you can tell me who she is.. cuz ... I haven't found her... and and that would be cool!
Wow way to sound hyper CJ.


Pretty kinky!
Grats! You're 74% kinky!
You kinkscore is pretty high. Most likely you're up for trying anything at least once, which show open-mindedness. You're probably a great lay, so just keep doing that thing you do!



CJ, you're a Irish Setter
No bones about it, you're a devil-may-care Irish Setter. Fun-loving and light-hearted, life is an adventure for you � an attitude your nearest and dearest find refreshing and inspiring. Witty, with a nose for fun, you can turn any social gathering into an unforgettable event, which is why you're always at the top of the guest list. Your varied interests � anything and everything from sky-diving to club hopping � make you extremely well-rounded. Just make sure you don't get distracted and lose sight of your responsibilities. As long as you stay balanced, you're a lucky dog who will always be a kid at heart � woof!


Some of the best moment's of my life have been spent in the arms of a beautiful female. When you're a baby you spend time in you're mother's arms. When you're old enough your gurls... and eventually ur wifes and then possibly enjoy the hugs and moments with a daughter.
If you're a guy.
Or bi.
heh
But seriously the best times I have had normally involve a member of the opposite sex. It seems though that the happiness created is only temporary, as commitment dies in the world and more often then not relationships end bitterly.

Also I must say ..especially lately... PEOPLE (Girls) drive me crazy!!! Do what you say your going too! And why take everything so personally like AHHHHHH. My sanity is dropping off every day until someday I'll be a muttering puddle of goo going *balurp blarg* shuffle..shuffle.. *balurp*... and I just want you all to know it's because of all the crazy girls in this world!!! Turtles are cute though....



I learned that life is more then just dicks and pussies. So is a relationship. So much of the dating these days is based on sex. Not to mention people are judged on their sexual experiences, guys getting scores, gurls being called whores...
It's a cruel unfair system and I refuse to be part of it. My self is not based on the size of my cock or the girls I've had in my bed.
What I love in a relationship are the simple things. Warm cozy nights together spent snuggling and talking. Holding hands and going out together. Silent times where words are not needed. Quiet glances, feeling loved, gazing into the other's eyes and knowing that at that moment all that you need is each other.
If you can communicate in a relationship, and if it's built on trust, it can survive. If not eventually thing's will head south and you end up back in the dating game.


Music keeps me sane. Without it I would run around in little circles flapping my arms and making donkey sounds or muttering some sort of gibberish that only the voices in my head could interrupt. Cept since I do that I guess umm music just makes the insanity less? heheh
I bought a guitar...and don't know how to string it cuz we broke a few of the strings...... SOMEONE HELP ME!!

Anyways I go to a lot of concerts (list is wayyyy down at the bottom of the page). I listen to lots of music. I support indie and avoid most mainstream. I don't support emo anything but some "emo" bands are okay. The style however drives me crazy.
*hums himself into a state of bliss*
Wait where was I? ahh the hell with it..
next section


My ethnicity, not that it matters but something I find really rather cool....
1/2 Lebanese
1/4 Black
1/4 French/Indian (metis maybe?)
Seriously if I wanted to be racist... I couldn't.. who do I make fun of? *laugh*


I'm in a rec outdoor soccer league, and floor hockey league. Just rec stuff but tis fun. The hockey team pretty much sucks.... soccer team is good though!! No more sports once school starts..ughz school.
I love the esks and oilers go team!! Hopefully we get smytty back..... we misses him.


"I am what I am and that is all I am, you got a problem with that?"
" You think you can tell me what to do ? You know who your talking to?"
" I think!! Therefore we really have nothing in common"
[start
Friend " Woaaa sweet!!"
Me" Hot girl?? where!! whereeee!!!"
Friend "what are you talkin about"
Me " You said woaa sweet.. i assumed..sweet..hot girl.. you know"
Friend " Right.. and you've been smoking what"
Me " Heh my bad"
end]
"A QUITTER never WINS a WINNER never QUITS"
"There's no I in team grif, ya there's also no you, so if your not on the team, and I'm not on the team... noone's on the god damned team!! ... the team sucks"<<red blue vs>>
"If God didn't want man to masturbate, why did he give him an opposable thumb, if God didn't want woman to masturbate why did he make the middle finger longest"
"A brilliant man would find a way to not fight a war"
"Blast"<<Stewie!!>>
"You're a gurl or maybe a wagon, filled up with pancakes!!"<<Strong Bad!!>>
"Before you criticize someone, try walking a mile in their shoes. Because then you'll be a mile away and you have their shoes." <<Chottie!!>>
"I'm sorry, I'm afraid I subscribe to the theory of intellectual osmosis. As such, I must now cease our conversation and move away from you before my intelligence begins to drop. Good day." <<gord>>
"There are three types of countries in this world. Dicks, pussies, and assholes. Pussies hate dicks cuz they get fucked by em, but dicks also fuck assholes, and assholes need to be fucked!" (That movie um american somethin police or somethin like that)
Me" I want one of those" (Talking about those cordless ear things you can have for your cell phones that a lady had on when she was talking to her kid at NAIT)
Meg" What.. a mom?"
Me"......"
Meg"OMG I'm so sorry that was mean"
Me*Sad*(Silly megan)


To everyone who was never given a chance
to the people who are laughed at
beaten down
but get back up and go out there and prove that they can do it without help ..
without encouragement
the underdog..
the forgotten
the alone
to those labelled as failures when they have more potential then people will ever give them credit
<3!! I'm with you all the way <3!


I write in my journals sometimes. Mostly seem to be when I'm depressed or annoyed. I have a few poems laying about some finished, some aren't, some may never be...
A few stories..
If you want to read something I have a few on nex here and the rest you can ask for and I shall give!
I feel my writing gives a deeper look into me and it is one way I express myself. Whether you understand and agree or disagree or don't have any clue what I am saying all opinions on my works are valued!
My ramblings and writings are pretty sporadic and rare though so if one goes up give it a read and a comment. Generally i'm trying to get some sort of point across.


I have my own personal beliefs... i don't really like organized religion of any sort... they always seem to have ways of excluding people and splitting people apart...
My experience with them is simple in that most religions are very judgemental. Also most claim to want to help other's and yet close their doors to those who need help the most. I believe if you want to help someone you open your arms to them and help, not push them away and belittle them.

[/color]
Strength!
Honor!
Courage!

Fight!
Win!!
Prevail!!!

Penetrate!!
Decimate!!
Dominate!!

Wicked
Awesome
Cool[/center]
The first is mine, the second is from Command and Conquer, the other two are mine. Hah!


Peace out !! (short and simple heh)


I am worth $2,473,764.00 on HumanForSale.com


My life has been very busy and hard. My family situation was abusive and filled with various things that I hope noone else has to go through but then the same time I know people who live it daily too. I've experienced drugs, attempted suicide, as have some people in my family, faced off alot of different things. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger and my life made me into a very driven individual. Maybe stubborn to some degree, I refuse help from people. I need to make it on my own to prove the underdog can do it. Most of the time I do but I still have my failings. Anyone wants to talk, I am definitly open and available!

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><>< That is right I alliteratted..ed...ed.... used alliteration!! Todd is a raver turtle he plays with glowsticks (Pic taken at Motion Notion) ><><[/center][/color]

Alrighty so no editting for now but quick run down of concerts I've attended.. and favorite groups!! (in no particular order)

Upcoming concerts (Most of which I will attend)
Rise Against
David Usher

Concerts Attended:

Raine Maida x2
Mindless self indulgence x2
The Fray
David Usherx2
Blue October
Brand New
Rise against x4 (w/ silverstein and comeback kid)
Taste of Chaos 2007 (Aiden, Chiodos, 30 seconds to mars, Senses Fail, The Used, Saoden)
Taste of Chaos 2008 (Atreyu, Avenged Sevenfold)
Warped Tour 2005
Warped Tour 2006
Warped Tour 2007
Warped Tour 2008 (All time low, Mayday parade, street dogs, horrorpops, motion city soundtrack, Family Force 5, Reel big fish, Rise against)
Warped Tour 2009
The Casanova Playboys
The Creepshow (W/ raygun cowboys, pavunda rosa, and someone else....)
Our Lady Peace x3 (w/ Pedestrian, Jets overhead, and Neverending White Lights)
AFI (w/ plain white T's)
Anberlin
Lacuna Coil (w/ Stolen Babies)
Strung Out (W/ A wilhelm scream and I am ghost)
Great Big Sea
Weird Al
Social Code x2
Newsboys x3
Third Day
Thousand Foot Krutch x2
Dropkick Murphys (w/ The Tossers and The Briggs)
Bedouin Soundclashx2(see below)
Metric (w/ bedouin soundclash and dragonette)
Pennywise x2
Creepshow (w/ AKA's)
Bad Religion
Rancid (w/ DOA and Wednesday Night Heroes)
Greenday

Raves Attended
Motion Notion 2007
Motion Notion 2008
Motion Notion 2009
Shambulah 2009

Comedy Shows Attended
Brad and Colin (From whose line is it anyways) x2
Russell Peters (In Oct)

Favorite Bands

Our Lady Peace
Death Cab for Cutie
Live
Metallica
Motion City Soundtrack
Dropkick Murphy's
DC Talk
Newsboys
Blue October
Fort Minor
Pennywise
Bad Religion
Greenday
Oasis
Stolen Babies
Great Big Sea
Infected Mushrooms
Stabbing Westward
Linkin Park
AFI
The Grates
The Pink Spiders
Street Dogs
Horror Pops
The Creepshow
Bayside
The Falcon
Metric
Weird Al
Arrogant Worms
David Usher
The Dresden Dolls
American Hi-Fi
Bon Jovi
Social Code
Rise Against