im in mexico. drunk as fuck.
going parasailing rtomorrow.
then tanning with my new friend miranda fr0m Vctoria/ ><3
I sometimes look back and wonder why I left it all, I think about our memories and what I'd do to have them back, but then I take a second glace and realize where you are in life, and how I would never want to be the cause of it. You aren't fit out to be the girl you are trying so hard to express and obtain. Those years of us on and off, I hardly know what to think of them now.
There are things in this world, that I don't understand.
Like: Love, war, gravity, or the lay of the land.
But all of these remain mysteries,
but one thing is for sure, you are worth living for.
Sometimes when I'm far away from you,
I get a little lost, a little out of my element.
I miss the way your body burns, when we melt alone.
New system. Hello Jaime. Let's blow this popsicle stand.
Days and Nights, they stay the same. The way you make her feel;
Useless, Ineffectual, and nonessential.
Get a Grip, Grasp what you have, before it's gone.
With all of your flaws, you have no right to judge.
Replaced, as if there was nothing to it.
those memories, turned to dust, blown away in that brutal wind.
Replaced, as if it meant nothing at all.
the laughter which surrogates with the sound of her name.
Lets not pretend now, we all know what goes on inside your head.
and how you're so predictable.
ill be the judge of what happens in my life.
live your own life the way you wished it to be.
take a stride through the park of hell
take a look at how great you have it.
don't secure yourself to the bottom of her shoes.
feeding off the ghastly meaningless shit she throws for you.
The shapes we see, the substances we feel, what is it that makes this all real?
Using our eyes, our hands, our nose, our mouth, we see what is around us.
From what we know, and what we learn, how do we know what to believe?
What is the truth, or perhaps the lie? No one knows; We can't rely.
You see yourself in the mirror, do you trust what is shown? How can you tell
what you see is real? You can't.
Our breath smelled of cigarettes and alcohol. We'd walk down the beach counting every star. Our hearts beat inside our chest leaving us gasping for every breath. Her smile with the wind blowing through her hair was so contagious in the air, so satisfying and I'm still smiling.
I wish I could run miles without becoming breathless, maybe then I would be able to swim the ocean, just to show you I care.
Another cigarette and I'm so bored. Your words aren't making sense and I was taken but you were waiting. One more drink and I'm convinced. Another minute lived, If you take me I'll take what you will give. I was late and she kept waiting,
but I hope she knows where I've been. I'm coming down, Bring me up, Take it off, Let's just touch.
Dizzy now. She sees the light. Nothing can stop her, the fullness she feels when the pain rushes through her. Night sky’s overcome her day lit dreams. The dreams in which no one would ever understand, the thrill while watching him suffer, choking on his own blood. Lying down as the light begins fading to black. Hearts beat slow, sounds dim out. Screaming, she starts screaming. No one can hear her, or perhaps she isn’t screaming aloud. She opens her eyes; the sight of him laying there forces that smile upon her face. The carpet glow crimson red, as red as the roses he once gave her. His cold eyes, harsh and painful, stare ever so peacefully at her now. Nothing could stop this rush. The love of her life, the one she were to spend every living second with; dead, motionless. She slowly leans in, pressing her lips softly and lightly against his. This kiss, the one she knew she would never forget, wasn’t what she expected. She wished for it to be unforgettable, but she now realizes that it’s just like any other kiss he had given her; cold and emotionless. She allows his head to rest against the blood stained carpet. She’s still; sitting beside the body, waiting as if something were to happen; for him to wake up, and give her a hug, telling her everything will once again be alright. He once made her feel so alive, but now nothing will fulfill that position. There were many questions, but not always were there answers.
miss you Christian Friesen, more than words could ever describe.
People have changed, life in general is different with you gone.
I will never forget your smile, your hugs, your amazing laughter.
I will never forget the memories we both constructed together.
School, life. It's not the same without you.
I'm sorry you had to leave so early in life. I wish you saw how many
people fucking LOVED you.
I fucking love you Chris.
Take care up there.
♥
Reversed; emptiness, I sit in this bathtub. Enjoying the cracked solitude we all suffer from.
I still can't see you.
The summer came and we got lost, all of us.
You are nothing without her.
I still wont remember your face,
the features mix too well with this alcohol.
So we cover ourselves in your fear,
and stay to watch that moon disappear under these lights.
This city, this city's screaming at me.
And as you breathe the words I better go.
The sun is up and taking back all the shadows that covered this ground,
and our feet, like a blanket of coal.
That you have a tiny dick, and I don't see why you think so highly of yourself.
