how many 'x's can u make while holding ur breath
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in life ppl go through a lot of shit and i mean a lot of shit and with that we all find ways to deal with it so ppl just accept it and some ppl find other solutions to cope but all in all do we really fully get over what has happened or what is happening... the future holds so many doors open for so many doors but what would happen if we could see past the doors and see the consequences the pros and cons of stepping through those doors you know.., would we have made the same choice or would we always pick the best way to go... no one really knows for sure what will happen when u go out at night you could end up being killed kidnapped raped anything... but if we dont go through and take that step we will never know what will happen... life is so unreal yet real at the same time that reality sometimes seems more like a dream and a dream seems more like reality...
so one thing to keep in mind is that never loose sight of what u have and what is to come and always always think b4 u open the door to a new life or to a new oppurtunity
so i have a chance to see my father he is coming to saskatoon on the 24 of april... reason no clue but ever since i was little i have always wanted to know who my real father is and to see what he looks like and who he really is... but inside there is a part of that is saying dont do it dont go i know how u have been waitring for this but dont go he wont accept the fact that u are his son that u are not even worth looking at not even worth a breath... so at the moment my head is all fucked up in a big blur should i or shouldn't... its like waiting years and years to find the one u fell in love with after being captured and then ucome back to find out that they have found someone else and have pretty much forgotten about you... so its like a once in a lifetime chane but the pain of being denied would be too much
soo if anyone has any suggestions on what to do or not to do please reply
I hate my name.
I miss somebody right now.
I watch more TV than I used to.
I love olives.
I love sleeping.
I own a lot of books.
I wear glasses or contact lenses.
I love to play Video games
I've tried marijuana.
I have been in a threesome.
I have been the psycho-ex in a past relationship.
I believe honesty is the best policy.
I like and respect Al Sharpton
I curse a lot.
I have changed a lot mentally over the last year.
I have a hobby
Have had sexual intercourse with opposite sex
I carry my knife/razor everywhere with me.
I've never broken anyone else's bones.
I have a secret that I am ashamed to reveal.
I love rain.
I’m REALLY paranoid.
I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free.
I need money right now.
I love sushi.
I talk really, really fast.
I have minty fresh breath in the morning.
I have semi-long hair.
I have lost money in Las Vegas.
I have at least one brother and/or sister.
I was born outside of Canada.
I shave my legs.
I have a twin.
I like the way I look.
I have friends.
I know how to do cornrows.
I am very pessimistic.
I have mood swings.
I think Britney Spears is/was pretty hot.
I have cheated on a significant other.
I have a hidden talent.
I’m always hyper no matter how much sugar I have.
I think that I’m popular, or have many friends
I have dyed my hair
I have kissed someone of the same sex.
I enjoy talking on the phone.
I practically live in sweatpants or PJ pants.
I love to shop.
I would rather eat than shop
I would classify myself as ghetto. doesnt everyone
I’m bourgie and have worn a sweater tied around my shoulders.
I’m obsessed with my blog!
I don’t hate anyone
I’m a pretty good dancer.
I'm embarrassed to be seen with my mother.
I have a cell phone.
I watch Much Music on a daily basis.
I have passed out drunk in the past 6 months.
I have never been in a real, serious relationship before
I’ve rejected someone before.
I currently have a crush on someone.
I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life.
I want to have children in the future.
I have changed a diaper before.
I’ve had the cops called on me before.
I bite my nails.
I’m not allergic to anything deadly.
I've been depressed before.
I am bisexual
I am homosexual
I collect comic books
I shut others out when I'm sad
I open up to others easily
I am keeping a secret from the world
I watch the news
I own over 5 rap CDs
I like Disney movies
I am a sucker for pretty eyes
I've slipped out a "wtf" in a real conversation]I love Martha Stewart
I really like someone
I am self conscious
I like to laugh a lot
I smoke a pack a day
I have cough drops when I'm not sick
I can't swallow pills
I have scars
I've been out of this country
I am really ticklish
I love chocolate
I am comfortable with being me
I play computer games/video games
I have gotten lost in the city
I have seen a shooting star
I had serious surgery
Talked to him/her for ‘like’ 5 sec and made out
Hugged a stranger
Been in a fist fight with the same sex
Been arrested
Laughed and had milk/soda come out of your nose
Pushed all the buttons on an elevator
Made out in an elevator
Swore at your parents
Kicked a guy where it hurts
Been skydiving
Been bungee jumping
Broken a bone
Played spin the bottle
Gotten the chicken pox
Ridden in a taxi
Shoplifted
Been fired
Had feelings for someone who didn't have them back
Stole something from work
Had a crush on a teacher/coach
Saw someone/something dying
Driven over 400 miles in one day
Been on a plane
Seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show
Thrown up in a bar
Eaten Sushi
Met someone in person from the internet
Been to a motocross show
Done hard drugs
Taken painkillers legally
Cheated on someone else
Saw Bucks Fizz in concert
Consumed alcohol
Run away from home
Lied to your parents about where you are
Hate more than love
Own an iPod or MP3 player
Are a sports fanatic
Would wear pajamas to school
Have a job
tYpE lIkE tHiS VeRy OfFtEn
Eat fast food weekly
Have self-inflicted scars
Believe in ghosts
Can't sleep if there is a spider in the room
Seen a therapist
Love white chocolate
Single
In a relationship
Kissed a stranger
Been obsessed with another person
Argued for the fun of it
Made out in a moving vehicle
Been to a casino
Been in a bar
Skipped school
Been punched
Been naked in public
Come close to death
Gotten stitches
Hooked up with 2 or more people in one night while drunk
Hooked up with 2 or more people in one night without alcohol
Bitten someone
Crashed into a friend's car
Been to Japan
Ever had a crush on someone of the same sex
Slept with someone you shouldn’t have
Been married
I believe everything happens for a reason
Had someone cheat on you
Over dosed ...you could say that... just alcholol
Have hated your life ..back in the day...
Have no one who cares
Like Monty Python
Addicted to Soap Operas
For Some really Fucked up reason The feelings that made me Cut my arm last January are returning they are slowly taking control of me again and making it so i cant be happy... Maybe i do need help the kind of help you would get in a mental instatute where your strapped to a bed in a white room with no one else but your self just so you cant cut just so u cant do anything...or maybe i need more pills to stabalize my mood disorders because i have finally met someone who accepts me for who i am and for what i look like and everything who loves me with all her heart and would die for me as i for her...No i will not let these emotions take control i dont want to put her through a more hell than that of what she is already dealing with so i am going to try my hardest not to end up back there...i love Jessica more than i have ever loved anyone she makes everything dissapear and everything that makes me happy come back yes like any couple we will have our little quarells but i wouldn't hurt her on purpose or not i could never hurt her she ahs already been though enough of that fucking shit that she dont need it from me....like what i did last night i now she wanted to see it happen and well i promised her i would do anything to make her happy anything....she wanted me and Perry to kiss and well i wanted her to be happy and so i did i actulay ot some tounge to lol....but i hate cheaters i have been cheated on by so many people and used by more that if it happens again i will WILL Kill my self becuase i wouldn't be able to handle it anymore none of it...but doing what i did last night i feel like Dying because even tho it was ok with her i did what happened to me by so many people so i have become the thing well one of the things that i hate the most out of all...last night when i got home i was faced with a tougher decision Take my Razor Balde and cut the feelings out or talk to someone...well im still alive and still here so u know what happened right ... Jessica you have no idea how much i love you writting this right now i am crying you are my everything and i dont want to lose you i believe we were meant to meet each other and meant to be together... because when i am around you everything is so much better like when my friend ended up in the hospital a few days ago i wanted belive that everything will be ok and before i came over it wasn't but when you held me in your arms everything felt so right and eveything was going to be ok...i dont want to lose you or fuck this relationship up...you mean everything to me...
Jessica you will forever be in my heart no matter what happens always and forever you will stay...You followed your heart and it lead you to me now listen to what it is saying and everything will be alright
Good Bye: Stephan C Booth
This time Im Not Going TO Let These emotions Take control over me again i am not going back into teh fucking hospital were i got abused....i will not let the fucking past take over my future the one that i have with Jessica i will not give in I WILL NEVER GIVE IN TO THE HATE of What You Did TO MeNever Again Will i cut because of you Never AGAIN...i will stay strong and for the sole purpose that i have someone with me that loves me more than you had ever loved me you fucking Bitch you took the best of my days ou of me just so you could have sex so then you can get your own Lustful pleasures and say to hell with you thats why you dimped me because i said no more sex its like someone hooked on drugs but this time your hooked on SEx and when i said no more it drove you crazy because you wanted to feel it well fuck you Tianna im never going to let you back into my life for the way you treated me and abused me...
Stephan Booth
To Dream Of something that you dont want to happen and it does you cant do shit about it to relive somthing that you never want to again you just wanna fucking kill your self say like i want to right now...Jessica i want to live on knowing you love me but i cant stand life anymore...and the only thing you can do now is just be there for me and tell me everything is going to be alright
