& she finally gave up,
she dropped the fake smile,
as a tear ran down her cheek
and she whispered to herself
"i can't do this anymore"
I refuse to judge someone before I know them. There is only one person that I can honestly say I trust. I miss my dog. I faint when I’m in pain, see blood and sometimes when my heart skips beats, like in Brad’s hot tub. I’ve had a potentially life threatening illness and recovered. But now my heart skips beats. Sometimes I can be a hypocrite. I over analyze things way too much and sometimes come up with something not even true and freak out about it. When something hurts me a lot, I don’t let it go. I can be a flirt. I love taking pictures. Sunshine puts me in a good mood. So does music. Boys with guitars and good voices are my weakness. I still like Disney movies. I like to write. I miss dance more than I have missed anything in the world. When I was born the nurses told my mom that I would be a dancer because my feet were already turned out, and they’ve been like that ever since. I hate that I tore my hamstring and cant do it anymore. I don’t have a best friend. There is no single person that I could call about anything, just a range of people I can call about certain things. I love catching up. I think people against gay marriages, rascist and sexist people are unintelligent and ignorant. I joke about the things that hurt me the most, or sometimes I just talk about it as if it doesn’t matter at all. I want to find someone who hates cheating as much as me. Hurting people is one of my worst fears and when I have to, it makes me nauseous. I don’t get embarrassed very easily. But I do blush really easily, even if I’m not embarrassed. The first thing I notice about people is their eyes. I love old-fashioned towns. I like being in graveyards. I love to watch and hear things that scare me even though that night I wont be able to sleep. Spiders terrify me and I have endless nightmares about them. Every once in awhile i have incredibly detailed and terrifying dreams, i wish i knew why. If there was a guy who had the same personality as Noah in the notebook, I would fall in love with him. My eyes change colors between blue green and gray depending on the season and sometimes my mood or what I’m wearing. If someone tries to pressure me to do something, it makes me do the exact opposite, even if I was going to do what they wanted in the first place. I’m a good liar when I need to be. I can keep secrets better than anyone I know. I somehow overcame my fear of needles and managed to get my ears nose and belly button peirced. Not that i didn't faint. I think “I love you” is said way too often. I love being in the country but I wouldn’t want to live there. I love to horse back ride and surf. I want to live in Texas at some point in my life, I miss vacationing there. I have an Italian citizenship. I hate it when people make things awkward when they don’t have to be. I wish that I had a best friend. I love camping. I want to learn to wakeboard. I hate what my dad did to my mom. I wish my brother didn’t go to boarding school for 3 years. I’m afraid of losing the people I love. I wish it was summer all year round accept for Christmas eve and Christmas day. There are things in my past I wish hadn’t happened. There are things in my past I wish would happen again. Over all, junior high was better than high school, but grade 11 was better than junior high. I miss Krista and Sara and wish that they never moved. I’m so happy that Brent didn’t move, I think I would die without him. I think its funny that me and Brent laugh at people when they think we do, have, or ever will like each other as more than friends. Ew. I like listening to old music. I could sit in a car and just drive aimlessly for hours as long as there is good music playing. I want a pet hedgehog. I like big dogs like retrievers and labs so so much better than those silly little ones you put in your purse. I love to sleep. I hate open doors. I like boys better than girls most of the time. I have an issue with trusting people. I can’t stand it when people complain about their lives ALL THE TIME when there’s nothing even close to bad happening to them. I know we all have our days, or even weeks, but really, let it go. I wish I had lived in the 50’s 60’s and 70’s. I hate homework with a passion, that’s what school is for. I’ve never understood people who HAVE to wear designer clothes. I hurt myself a lot. I get sick a lot too, I’m pretty sure my immune system just doesn’t even work. I love to shower. Bens dog is probably the best cuddle I’ve ever had. I kind of want to steal him. I love motorboats. I love being in motorboats at sunset, probably the most romantic thing ever. I’ve been told many times I look like Lindsay Lohan and I really don’t understand why. She has red hair, and I just don’t look like her at all, seriously not even a little bit. I tend to procrastinate. I love sweet talk, even though its complete bullshit, its still cute haha. Then again, too much is just annoying. I still sleep with a stuffed animal. Two actually. Stampede is the best part of the year. I love flowers. Especially white lilies and red roses. I like chocolate and candy, but I’m only ever in the mood for one or the other. I hate jello. And jello shooters. And every experience that I’ve ever had with jello. I wish I lived closer to the ocean. It is one of the most beautiful things there is. I like to wear sweat pants. Especially boys sweat pants cuz for some reason they are always more comfortable. I love girls days, especially with Chantel. Sun burns are a serious bummer. I like having deep conversations, the ones where you forget where you are. I wish I had a cottage to go to in the summer. I love my family. Especially my grandma and how we email each other all the time, and how she’s the greatest cook ever, gotta love Italians. I’m also really close with my mom and my Aunt Brenda. My family on my dads side is really loud. I like talking on the phone. I like good parties. I want to be a forensic psychologist. I love when your incredibly hung over and you have a random memory from the night before and start laughing uncontrollably and everyone around looks at you like your retarded because two minutes ago you were talking about how you were positive your going to die at any moment. I like promenading with Michelle. I love lake Bonavista. Getting text messages makes me happy. I like camp fires. I like camping with Katie and Braeden and Grayden and Alexa and Brent. I like to jog. I like to swim. I can be too emotional. I’m a very jealous person when I really care about someone. I only like how I look once in awhile. I compare myself to others. I can be self-conscious. I hate losing things. I hate when people lead me on. I hate when people do it more than once. I hate it when after someone leads me on they go back to the way things were and act like nothing ever happened. I have one dimple. Boys that can dance are hot. Mostly Travis from so you think you can dance. I’ve been through a lot of shit when I was younger that not many people know about, and when I first tell someone they are always really shocked, because its never really affected me that much, and I think it would fuck a lot of people up, I guess its weird that it didn’t mess me up, but the past is the past. I like Dr. Phil. Sometimes me and my cousins listen to super old music and sing at the top of our lungs just for the hell of it. I strongly dislike it when I’m talking to someone and they don’t pay attention or start talking in the middle of it. When I was 5, I knew all the words to Mary Poppins. One time me and my brother found a baby bird that fell out of a nest and we tried to raise it, but it was too little and died the second night, and I cried anyways. It’s a huge piss off when guys tell their friends that they could get me anytime they wanted because I’m basically in love with them when I really just don’t even like them. Apparently I send off the wrong messages. It bothers me when people don’t ever shut up on msn. I believe that music is the cure for every problem you have in your life. I have lost friends/family to cancer, suicide and murder. It bugs me when people are really two faced and only talk to you when they’re around certain people. It also bugs me when people are really two faced and are sometimes really nice to you and other times are a complete asshole or just don’t talk to you at all. I think some growing up is required in both those situations. Getting dumped is pretty gay. If I could cure only one illness in the world, it would be cancer. I don’t like it when people creep. I’m terrible at math. I like to sit around my fire pit in the summer with friends and drink beer and cook smores and hot dogs. I like pretty much any kind of music except screamo. That gives me a headache. I think RocKsTone is a great band, and so should everyone else. People who write me hate messages when they don’t know me really confuse me, maybe I’ll try it one time and find out if it makes me feel fantastic. Either way, I think about half the population of nexopia needs to take a chill pill. People spend way too much time on here. I’m Closter phobic. It takes a lot of thinking for me to be able to explain myself properly. I work at a retirement home. And i love it. I firmly believe that music is meant to be loud in cars. I wish my hair wasn’t so curly so that I wouldn’t have to straighten it all the time. Or I wish it was pretty when it was curly. I like red. I like sandwiches. The four main girls in my life are Sara Krista Alexa and Michelle, its been that way since grade 4 and its not going to change. I also love Brittany Kaela Sandra Jaden Gillian and Lindsay. I love everyone from Nickle and I wish that we were all still as close as we were. I also love the fact that we have such an unconditional bond with eachother, anytime you need anything, we all know we can count on the nickle crew. I have a strong suspicion as to who i will marry. I always have my phone on incase someone ever needs me. My mom tells me that I’m mature for my age, or that I’ve been 30 from the time I was three. I don’t like it when people cant take a hint. I have really strong morals and pretty much nothing can change them, its probably one of the few times I will stand up for myself. That’s a lie, I’ll stand up for myself any time I feel strongly about something. I don’t take peoples shit. Unless I love them, but even then it’s only for a matter of time. I wish I knew how to fight, because getting jumped kind of sucks. I like to watch cold case files. Alicia: My Story is a book about the Holocaust, and it’s probably the best book I have ever read in my life. I like wearing rings. I like English class. Often people's first reaction upon walking into my room is "jesus you have alot of pictures!". I’ve broken my toe, my pinkie, fractured two ribs, and two bones in my palm. I've been told that i come across as emotionless because i only let people very close to me see when i am truly upset and even then, its not a common occurance. I like swings. And doing sittups. I don’t know what else to say.
1. Name: Cara
2. Your Nick Names: Carebear, car-a, cara bara.
3. Current Location: Calgary
4. Date Of Birth: April 28 1989
5. Zodiac Sign: Taurus
6. Male Or Female: Female
7. Age: 17
8. School: Scarlett
9. Occupation: none
Your Appearance
12. Hair Color: Blonde
13. Hair Long or Short: Long
14. Eye Color: mm weird.. sometimes blue sometimes green sometimes gray
15. How Do Your Nails Look: like nails
17. Do You Have A Crush On Someone: um i would hope so, he is my boyfriend haha
18. Do You Like Yourself: i guess
20. Think Your Attractive: not particularly
21. Piercings: ears, nose
22. Tattoo: nope
23. Righty or Lefty: Righty
Your 'Firsts'
24. First Rollercoaster: calloway park when i was a youngster
25. First Cell Phone: grade 9
26. First Best Friend: Zack Madden
27. First Award: for ballet when i was 4 haha
28. First Sport You Joined: dance
29. First Pet: my black lab shadow
30. First Vacation: dang i dont know, probably to dallas tx to visit my dad?
31. First Concert: shania twain
32. First True Love: trev
Favorites
33. Movie: the notebook, center stage, now and then, scary ones.
34. TV Show: greys anatomy, one tree hill
35. Color: green or red
36. Band: red hot chilli peppers
37. Song: i dont have one
38. Food: subway
40. Candy: fuzzy peaches!
41. Sport: dance
42. Favorite Sport To Watch: dance, gymnastics, hockey
43. Brand Of Clothing: i dont care, clothes are clothes
44. Stores: music stores, like i said, i dont care about clothes haha
45. School Subject: english
46. Animal: dogs, but the big ones not the ones u put in your purse
47. Radio Station: Q107
48. Magazines: cosmo
Currently
49. Eating: nothing
50. Drinking: nothing
52. Online: yeah
53. Listening To: the radio
54. Thinking About: lots
55. Wanting: michelle to call so we can go prominading haha
56. Watching: nothing
57. Wearing: sweats and a tank top
Your Future
58. Want Kids: yes
59. Want To Get Married: Yes
60. Careers In Mind: forensic psychology
Which is Better With The Opposite (or same) Sex
67. Cute Or Sexy: mix of both
68. Lips Or Eyes: Eyes
69. Hugs Or Kisses: kisses
70. Short Or Tall: Tall
71. Easygoing Or Serious: both
72. Romantic Or Spontaneous: both
73. Fatty Or Thin: athletic
74. Quiet Or Loud: middle
75. Hook-up Or Relationship: Relationship
76. Sweet Or Caring: Caring
77. Trouble Maker Or Hesitant One: trouble
Have You Ever
78. Kissed A Stranger: no
79. Drank Alcohol: never. hahahaha. of course i have.
80. Smoked: yeah
81. Ran Away From Home: no
83. Swear At Your Rents: only my dad
84. Broke Someones Heart: yeah
85. Loved Someone: yes
86. Turned Someone Down: yes, hardest thing to do ever.
87. Cried When Someone Died: yes
88. Eaten Sushi: no, i hate seafood
Do You Believe
89. God: yes
90. Miracles: i dont know, i havent been proven to believe either way
91. Love At First Sight: no
92. Ghosts: i do but only in a certain way.
93. Aliens: no
94. Soul Mates: yes
95. Heaven: yes
96. Hell: not really, which is weird.
98. Kissing On The First Date: lol yeah
99. Horoscopes: yeah sometimes. they can be creepily true.
Answer Truthfully
100. Is There Someone You Want But Can't Have: no, i have the one i want.
1] Who are you?
[2] Are we friends?
[3] When and how did we meet?
[4] How have I affected you?
[5] What do you think of me?
[6] What's the fondest memory you have of me?
[7] How long do you think we will be friends or enemies?
[8] Do you love me?
[9] Have I ever hurt you?
[10] Would you hug me?
[11] Would you kiss me?
[12] Would you fuck me?
[13] Are we close?
[14] Emotionally, what stands out?
[15] Do you wish I was cooler?
[16] On a scale of 1-10, how nice am I?
[17] Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
[18] Am I loveable?
[19] How long have you known me?
[20] Describe me in one word.
[21] What was your first impression?
[22] Do you still think that way about me now?
[23] What do you think my weakness is?
[24] Do you think that I am wierd?
[25] What about me makes you happy?
[26] What about me makes you sad?
[27] What reminds you of me?
[28] What's something you would change about me?
[29] How well do you know me?
[30] Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
[31] Do you think I would kill someone?
[33] Who else reminds you of me?
[32] If you I told you I had 3 weeks to live what would we do?
[34] If I died would you cry?
[35] When was the last time we fought?
[36] Are you going to put this on your journal and see what I say about you?
[37] What song reminds you of me ?
[38] If we where going on a date where would you take me?
[39] What is in your opinion, my best asset?
-spiders
-blood
-seeing people cry/get hurt
-heartbreaks
-losing stuff
-lies
-how people seem to change over night
-missing the nickle kids
-Cheaters
-nexopia creepers. if u want to get a girl, i suggest not hitting on her through the interenet, it isnt as appealing as you may think. particularly if you are like 30 years older.
-when people talk about something/someone they know NOTHING about and pretend that they do
-people that are fake and purposely come across as someone completely different than who they actually are. just be yourself.
-cancer
dancing.shopping.boys.cuddling.kissing.holding hands.sweet talk.pictures.flowers.sunsets.sunrises.chocolate.candy.summer.christmas.memories.music.scrap books.the ocean.laughing.sweatpants.girls days.MACKS.love letters. visits from Sara.perfect moments.tanning.deep conversations.flirting.horse back riding.cottages.hot days.rainy days.jumping in puddles.one word stories.msn.family dinners.horoscopes.secret admirers.magazines.food.talking on the phone.best friends.sincere guys.going to the beach.honesty.parties.drinking games.strip poker.ice cream.milk shakes.prominading.the lake.boys who can dance.movies.skinny dipping.willow trees.stampede.cliff jumping.the notebook.now and then.armageddon.hotel parties.revenge.motor boats.paddle boats.boyfriends.i love you's.sleeping.falling asleep with boys.sleepovers.sleepovers with boys.good teachers.psychology.dejavou.random drunk memories.snow ball fights.skating.cell phones.text messages.nickle.grade7+8+9.smiles.eye conversations.fires.camping.road trips.smores.michelles dock.toboganning.swimming.good deeds.adventures.mysteries.my grandma's houses.dirty conversations.love.happy days.gifts for no reason.hand made gifts.hand made cards.all nighters.sleeping in.hot tubs.the gym.jogging.pillows and blankets.laying in bed.christmas eve. new years eve.rings.heels.clothes.makeup.confidence.eyes.lips.hair.belly button rings.tongue rings.lazy days.the bench at the top of the hill.special looks.crying.energy.telling stories.little kids.baby animals.going to lethbridge.spring.my cousins.meeting new people.good books.love stories.slurpee's.late summer nights.keeping in touch.nexopia.comments.messages.suprises.falling in love.california.florida.texas.alberta.ontario.laughing at nothing.laughing at something nobody else would get.being with you.the old days.old fashioned towns.sleigh rides.vacations.being healthy.singing.old music.one tree hill. the o.c.christmas movies.rollar blading.candles.flash lights.ghost stories.notes.e-mails.knowing things other people dont.keeping secrets.buying people presents.superstition.mary go rounds.play grounds.swings.people who dont change because of other people.roof tops.happiness.sarcasm.going on walks.friendly people.my friends!
