i am very athletic and very outgoing i ride horses want to be in the ufc after i go to college to become a mechanic.

98% of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you are one of the 2% who hasn't, copy this into your profile

Man Laws

1: Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.

2: It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following Circumstances:

(a) When a heroic dog dies to save its master.
(b) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her Blouse.
(c) After wrecking your boss's car.
(d) When she is using her teeth.

3: Any Man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his buddies.

4: Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.

5: If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever unless you actually marry her.

6: Moaning about the brand of free beer in a buddy's fridge is forbidden. However complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable.

7: No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is strictly optional. At that point, you must celebrate at a strip bar of the birthday boy's choice.

8: On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.

9: When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who's playing.

10: You may flatulate in front of a woman only after you have brought her to climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent entertainment, she's officially your girlfriend.

11: It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you're sunning on a tropical beach ... and it's delivered by a topless model and only when it's free.

12: Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another guy in the nuts.

13: Unless you're in prison, never fight naked.

14: Friends don't let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed.

15: If a man's fly is down, that's his problem, you didn't see anything.

16: Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers.

17: A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must remain sober enough to fight.

18: Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both, that's just greedy.

19: If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you'd better be talking about his choice of beer.

20: Never join your girlfriend or wife in discussing a friend of yours, except if she's withholding sex pending your response.

21: Phrases that may NOT be uttered to another man While lifting weights:

a) Yeah, Baby, Push it!
b) C'mon, give me one more! Harder!
c) Another set and we can hit the showers!

22: Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing: i.e., both urinating, both waiting In line, etc. For all other situations, an almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need.

23: Never allow a telephone conversation with a woman to go on longer than you are able to have sex with her. Keep a stopwatch by the phone. Hang up if necessary.

24:The morning after you and a girl who was formerly "just a friend" have carnal, drunken monkey sex, the fact that you're feeling weird and guilty is no reason for you not to nail each other again before the discussion occurs about what a big mistake it was.

25: It is acceptable for you to drive her car. It is not acceptable for her to drive yours.

26: Thou shalt not buy a car in the colors of brown, pink, lime green, orange or sky blue.

27: The girl who replies to the question "What do you want for Christmas?" with "If you loved me, you'd know what I want!" gets an Xbox. End of story.

28: There is no reason for guys to watch Ice Skating or Men's Gymnastics. Ever.

29: We've all heard about people having guts or balls, but do you really know the difference between them? In an effort to keep you informed, the definition of each is listed below:

"GUTS" is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being assaulted by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to say, "are you still cleaning or are you flying somewhere?"

"BALLS" is coming home late after a night out with the guys smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the ass and having the balls to say, "You're next!

Temperature Joke
50° Fahrenheit (10° C)
• New Yorkers try to turn on the heat.
• Canadians plant gardens.

40° Fahrenheit (4.4° C)
• Californians shiver uncontrollably.
• Canadians Sunbathe.

35° Fahrenheit (1.6° C)
• Italian Cars won't start
• Canadians drive with the windows down

32° Fahrenheit (0 ° C)
• Distilled water freezes
• Canadian water get thicker.

0° Fahrenheit (-17.9° C)
• New York City landlords finally turn on the heat.
• Canadians have the last cookout of the season.

-40° Fahrenheit (-40° C)
• Hollywood disintegrates.
• Canadians rent some videos.

-60° Fahrenheit (-51° C)
• Mt. St. Helens freezes.
• Canadian Girl Guides sell cookies door-to-door.

-100° Fahrenheit (-73° C)
• Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
• Canadians pull down their ear flaps.

-173° Fahrenheit (-114° C)
• Ethyl alcohol Freezes.
• Canadians get frustrated when they can't thaw the keg.

-460° Fahrenheit (-273° C)
• Absolute zero; all atomic motion stops.
• Canadians start saying "cold, eh?"

-500° Fahrenheit (-295° C)
• Hell freezes over.
• The Vancouver Canucks win the Stanley Cup

From a guys point of view:


We don't care if you talk to other guys.
We don't care if you're friends with other guys.
But when you're sitting next to us, and some random guy walks
into the room and you jump up and tackle him,
without even introducing us, yeah, it pisses us off.



It doesn't help if you sit there and talk to him for ten minutes without even
acknowledging the fact that we're still there.



When guys meet a girl, that they fall hard for and spend whole nights
and days spending it with them, they obviously like you,
its not that they want a huge friendship



We don't care if a guy calls you, but at 2 in the morning we do get
a little concerned. Unless someone is dying, it can wait till the morning.



Also, when we tell you you're pretty, gorgeous, cute or stunning,
we freaking mean it.Don't tell us we're wrong.
We'll stop trying to convince you.



The sexiest thing about a girl is confidence.
Yeah, you can quote that.



Don't be mad when we hold the door open.
Take Advantage of the mood we're in.



LET US PAY FOR YOU!
DON'T "FEEL BAD"
We enjoy doing it.
It's expected.
Smile and say "thank you."



Kiss us when no one's watching.



If you kiss us when you know somebody's looking,
we'll be more impressed.



You don't have to get dressed up for us.
If we're going out with you in the first place, you don't have
to feel the need to wear the shortest skirt you have or
put on every kind of makeup you own.
We like you for WHO you are and not WHAT you are.




Honestly, we think a girl looks more beautiful when she's just in her pj's
or our t-shirt and boxers, not all dolled up



Don't take everything we say seriously.

Sarcasm is a beautiful thing. See the beauty in it.



Don't get angry easily.



Stop using magazines/media as your bible.



Whatever happened to the word "handsome"?
We'd be utterly stunned by a girl who greeted me with "Hey handsome!"
instead of "Hey baby/ stud/ cutie/ sexy" or whatever else you can think of.
On the other hand I'm not saying i wouldn't like it either ; )



Girls, I cannot stress this enough: IF YOU AREN'T BEING TREATED
RIGHT BY A GUY, DON'T WAIT FOR HIM TO CHANGE. DITCH HIS
SORRY, DISGRACE-TO-THE-MALE-POPULATION ASS, AND FIND
SOMEONE WHO WILL TREAT YOU WITH UTTER RESPECT-/center]

i like people who act like themselves around my friends. i like girls who would like to go out for a walk insead of just staying in the house.

people who act like they are better than everyone else. if they are playing a game and they win and just wont shut up about it until you are ready to pound their face in.
peoppel who start talking to you and then just stop with out and answer