So there's this guy. i've really liked him for almost a year now. the thing is...he doesn't stay in my life for long periods of time. he's back again and i can't help but wonder how long he'll be here for this time. i'm supposed to see him sometime soon, and i want nothing more. but how can i? i've missed him alot over the last month and a half and seeing him again would be amazing, i just don't want him to leave again. i'm not saying he has to be my boyfriend i'm not asking for a relationship cuz i know thats not something he wants right now. i just want to know that i have him as a friend and that he's not going to leave me again anytime soon.
i wish i knew what was going on. i love having just a little bit of control over every aspect of my life and with him i have none. i want to know what he wants, i want to know if he actually cares. if i had slept with him would any of this still be happening. we weren't even techinically dating and i feel like i'm going through a horrible break-up. will he still talk to me when he's figured everything out? will he still want me? i just want to be with him. i don't want to lose him again.
