that you're lost,
and that you'll never find your way.
you think you know someone,
and then you blink and everything you thought was there vanished.
i always thought i knew what life was about,
or what i thought life could be about.
im not sure if everything ive ever done was looked past,
as if maybe it wasnt for the better of every single person alive
but i want to cherish the moments i have
one day i know that theyre going to be gone and all
I will have left are the moments when i closed my eyes .
is that you're not mine, you're not mine.
- dear song, please exit my head .
im not content at the moment
and im still awake.
i dont even want to sleep.
im not even sure why im writing a nexopia blog right now,
but i just kind of felt like it ,
also : jasey rae is stuck in my head
" dont make this easy i want you to mean it "
that line is stuck in my head.
it WONT GO AWAYYYYY
so !
i totally searched for girls cause im a loser
and someone very unexpecting came up
please dont have plus ?
i know who i am and i know who im not.
and this life is way too confusing.
if things could be more simple, than maybe
i would have a chance, but no .
i dont see myself being successful and thats
what hurts me the most. i just wish i had
the courage to be who i am.
ugh so confusing.
Number:
Of times you've been in love? 1
Of girls you have kissed? somewhere between 10-15
Of boys you have kissed? somewhere between 20 - 25
People you would classify as trust your life with type of friends? brayden weirmeir = 1
Of times your name has appeared in a newspaper? 0
Of scars on your body? 5
Of things in your past you regret? who the fuck knows
Do you think you are...?
Pretty? i have my days
Funny? also i have my days
Hot? hmm, sometimes
Friendly? yes
Ugly? somedays i cant help but feel that way
Loveable? yes sir i am
Caring? yes
Sweet? can be
Favorite:
Actor/actress: i dont really have one
Least favorite day: most saturdays to be honest
Flower: lillies
Jello flavor: strawberry and lime
Jewelry: earrings / plugs =)
Summer/winter: winter
Person who last:
Slept in your bed: me and gavin
Saw you cry: not sure
Sent you an email: facebook
Have you:
Said "I love you" and meant it? yes
Went out in public in PJs? yes
Kept a secret from everyone? its all out in the open now
Been to New York? no
To California? yes
When was your...?
Last cigarette: 3 months ago, IM DOING GOOD
Last cry: sometime in the past week
Last phone call: dealer, LOL , not for me, just using my phone. my last phone call is maegan calling me
Last regret: dono
Last shower: 1030 this morning
Last dream: last night but i dont rememebr what it was
Last time being completely happy: not sure, i was completely happy today though
What was the...?
Last book you read: wrecked, not done yet though
Last curse word you uttered: fuck
Last beverage you drank: coke
Last food consumed: mcnuggets (:
Last TV show you watched: Hockey game
Last thing in your past you regret? Not really sure
Last shoes worn: Puma's, i was at the gym
Last cd played: behemoth
Last thing written (not typed): no idea
Last word spoken: well i said "omg mom shut up "
Last IM: no clue im not on msn
just isnt that fun anymore..
I'm fighting with myself,
I can't hurt you even though you hurt me.
