i don't really know what to write, or even what to say.
other then anything about you; of course.
i'm completely fixated by the sound of your voice racing circles around in my mind. shadows of you sneak through my perifirals and i imagine that you may have actually walked past me. for a second, i could even smell you; taste you.
i visit you every day, i run the grass above where you lay through my fingers. i close my eyes, breathe. remember your eyes, your lips, the touch of your skin. i don't want to forget but i can feel it all slipping away from me.

don't slip away baby, stay with me.

fuuuuck.
sorry i fucked things up royally with you.
i wish we could be just friends.


buuuut i got steve now =)
lately i'm trying to figure out if i'm just settling or i'm actually in love.
time will tell.

til then, suck it bitch.

there's a new boy in town baby,
and he's fabulous.
<3

i'm not gonna say what i really should say because what i might say i'll probably regret later.
even though i've said it 1000 times before.
but i need to fucking stop this damn repetition.

but i will say that i lie awake at night,
thinking
and knowing
that i'm what he needs,
but not what he wants.

i daydream of this world where i'm perfect.
i'm what every man wants in their life.
i'm the girl.


chyea right.
i'm just a fuck.

is making some biiig changes.
like,
-drinking less
-smoking more ( i need to, streeeess stress stress )
-get a job
-do better in my classes

and a shitload of other things.

nexopia is slowly dyyyinnngg.
poor ol chap !
you were good while you lasted.

and by the way!
you've got some fucking nerve you piece of shit.
you are officially blacklisted.

holy baby,
seeing you creep my page brought up so many memories.
i miss you like crazy fool.
creep me more often, you know who you are.

don't be a stranger anymore!

saskatoon next summer, siast or the U of S.
not sure yet.
but something, where family is.

liife is good, and i am happy with where i am right now.
i dont dwell, bitch, complain.
for once in my life, hah.
it's kind of nice actually.

shiiiiit, i do have a lot of babies though.
i'm hoping that that part of my life will be better when they're schoolage.
cause no offence k&z,
but man, i really dislike babies.
crazy how i went from being 16 and never wanting kids and 19 with 2.
i just wish everyone that doesn't know me,
could understand what happened.
know my story.

but that'd take a long ass time, and i don't have time.

wow! here i am complaining right after i said i don't anymore.
okay so,
maaaayybee i bitch sometimes.
but hey i'm still a woman cut me some slack. =P

duty calls,
h.

hey hey heeeey,
heidi here =)
life is good, no complaints
babies are the saaamehh.

i like camrose and have no intentions of moving anytime soon,
i'll be going to augustana come next fall.
psychology and something music.

i've erased all men completely for awhile, nooot interested what so ever.
(other then a good fuck here and there but hey, that's a givin)

nexopia blows i don't even know why i'm on here, or why i keep buying plus.
facebook ftw.
PEEEACEEE ! =)

nexopia kinda really sucks now.

quit looking at my page.
k thanks.

plus is gone, and i'm broke.

i loooooveloveloveloveLOVE my children.
they make me get my butt out of bed in the morning,
literally.
kyden sits on me.