i dont know whats happening, since that night that house has been funny.

Its somber...the lights begin to glow.

it sucks me in, but i can only watch from afar.

I dont believe this... what will happen

Day in Day out
i do the same thing
does iit bore me
no i suppose not
life is supposed to be different
no its always the same
every person i meet
every thing i see
nothing glows anymore
nothing left to really see
well theres a world out there
but why would i go somewhere to see someone elses backyard
yeah your right
such a waste of time
time to sleep
damn just another day to wake for

no its wasnt just that one night stand
of course you wanted more
why wouldnt you
the beauty you had in your eyes
then why did you say good bye?
because i had to.
WHy, why would you have to if you cared?
because its whats best for her, isnt it?
no maybe yes, thats all for her to decided not you.
What if she cant decided and you know.
well maybe thats a different question.
Shes says her drama
what about it
would you want that
well if i could help with anything i would, it doesnt matter if its drama or not
why was it so cold and easy for her to say goodbye
i cant answer that
yes you can
ha fine ill play, because u were toyed with
no fuck that no one toys with me
then why
why cou;ldnt she answer why
maybe she can

I suppose we go everyday with out realizing how much changes around us, most the time we even change without realizing it. Your dont really get that horrible wake up call until that one thing that sets you off. Like seeing the first girl you ever had sex with, now thats fucked up. you stop and think wow shes grown up, but then your think well so have i. then you worry damn im getting old, but wait im only eighteen. Now you think wow and then you look at the girl your dating now and you think, what will she look like to me in 5 years, ha or 25. Yes this is how life goes, and t hen your reach my age of 18 and a family death occurs, maybe not the first but your at an age now where you can understand what this means, old enough to envision yourself in his/her place one day. Lifes a horrible thing that wears you out over time if you let it. I think back to the good and bad times ive had so far knowing theres gunna be a lot more. Remembering that time when i was 17, way to high less than a year ago even that i asked a girl to marry me, and the crazy bitch said yes. See life is just fucked so dont let life fuck you, fuck life, dont let it steall years at a time make a difference and go out there and make as many happy memories as possible and make it happen.

Does it make any sense. No it doesnt. But what can we do. I suppose nothing when you think about it really.Hmm ya nothing really.