"IS JESSIE GOING TO HAVE TO PUNCH A BITCH?"

:"I would pretty much do any job right now that doesn't involve sex or touching insects!"
: "That def. rules out "crack-whore," because that involves sex and touching insects, because usually crack-whores live in places with a lot of roaches."

" I had to throw my panties in the woods."

"Come on let's hurry up and finish this so I can go outside and ride my unicorn"

" Does anyone have a sippy cup?"

: let's the kiss to see if we have chemistry.
: uhm.. i can't. i have... chapped lips.
: c'mon just one kiss!
: no!! i have chapped lips godammit!! get away from me!!
: AHHHHHHHHH
: Dont hold back, its meant to be
: ewww you smell like bananas.
: holy fuck that was a close one.
: how can you reject me? i'm the great converter!

"nipple cupcakes"

"Whenever I look at you, I feel completely dismantled."