http://godisimaginary.com/

Ever since man invented drinking he invented things to drink to,
so tap your glass here's mine in all of it's unedited glory.

cheers

This is for the evening where there are no worries
The long awaited weekend getaway from the working week
where one-through-to-ten are your lucky numbers
and bar girls tangoing with 50 cent high balls spells winning streak

This is for the evening that is a shaded excuse
because you probably had something better to do.
With black spots and white polka dots
A tIe around your forehead and a caesar stained suit

This is for the evening when the first drink won't due.
Where your staring at your glass thinking, "You cold mother fucker".
This is for the evening where the rain is coming down so hard.
It's cutting through your jacket.

This is for the evenings when you are just too fucked up to give a shit.
Where Slurred speech and a stumbling gate are song and dance.
Where screaming at a lamp post barely does how you feel justice
and you would love to go home if you could just figure out where you left it

The residences are lined up
Like Napoleonic soldiers
All the lawns have military haircuts
and all the fences are like shields in arm

I broke the windows,
To see inside your house
To see if you were any different than the rest

I broke the windows,
and All I got was a beer stained couch.
and a bible on the bed post

In these suburbs I'm seeing the western dream through pipe smoked eyes
In this residence I'm learning every soldier rots and dies

Chairman: HULLO!
Board of directors: We are eager and awaiting your next announcement it must be suitably delicious.
Chairman: DELICIOUS IT WILL BE MY FELLOW SQUIDULAR ATTACK BEASTS!*
Board of directors: (tentacles slap happily across their faces, much like a happy dogs jowls at the arrival of it's food dish creating a wet slapping sound. Their globular eyes form upwards half crescents in sheer ecstatic delight)
Chairman: (Pleased with the build he has created within his audience yet tentative to fully penetrate into the climax of informational frustration that has been carefully constructed with obnoxiously loud shouting) IT IS TIME TO PUT FORTH THE AGENDA!
Board of directors: Lather us with your thick oily agenda and coat us with it's terms
Chairman: TOMORROW THE TARGET* RECEIVES HIS FIRST LESSON IN A SERIES OF TRAINING ATTEMPTS SPANNING THE COURSE OF ONE MONTH. AFTER OF WHICH IT IS ASSUMED HE WILL BE AWARDED A PERMIT ENABLING HIM TO FREELY TRAVEL AS HE PLEASES WITH MINIMAL LIMITATIONS
Board of directors:( A thick juicy spurt squirts onto the table in a stream of phlegm originating from a directors head. He dies instantly. The cause is pinned on a rogue doughnut in the coffee room, despite the timing in relation to information that the directer had just received. His fellow directors descend upon his limp cooling corpse and recycle his nutrients in a matter of moments)
Chairman: NOT QUITE THE REACTION I HAD PLANNED BUT ONE A MILKY WAY GALAXY MORE EXCITING. I PLANETARY DIGRESS. HE HAS ALSO CANVASED HIS ARM IN A SUBSTANCE SIMILAR TO YOUR FACE DISCHARGE. WE PLAN THE TARGET TO HAVE COMPLETED HIS SKIN DEFACEMENT BY THE 13TH OF MARCH. THIS WILL CONFUSE AND SEGREGATE THE ENEMY!*
Board of directors: (Squid happily, black gooey circles stain their 2-3 button suits)
CHAIRMAN: I CALL THIS MEETING TO A CLOSE, WE'LL MEET AGAIN SHORTLY PAY ATTENTION TO YOUR COMPANY POSTS. (Chairman disappears into thick brown cloud, when it clears the chairman is gone. It can be assumed he is licking old books around town to spread his germs to the angry pseudo intellectuals)
Board of directors: (taking the suit of the fallen director they begin the regrowth process of a new director inside a tube of pure genetically modified gummy bears. Sentient to the point of knowing they are going to die)

1* work that into as many sentences as you can, I know I have.
2*Myself
3*Various stray vagabonds and hipsters

eff my life. I hate being sick.

all kg.

dead: 120 kg
squat: 120 kg
bench: 75 kg

all measurements in pounds
squat: 253
deadlift: 258.5
clean and press: 110
shoulder press:99
bench: 165

fuck yeah.

terrible I know but just to keep track.

squat: 225.5 pounds
dead: 231ish
bench: 137ish

Rick says:
There is something on the tip of my tongue that is epic good that way
Lost on the Moon says:
I can hear it
Lost on the Moon says:
but not say it ><;;
Rick says:
please re-read that
Lost on the Moon says:
....
Rick says:
with a terrible tragic sense of humour
Lost on the Moon says:
bawahahahahahhahaahahaha
Lost on the Moon says:
Oh words, even on MSN you betray me
Rick says:
if only we could speak in strange bleeting noises
Lost on the Moon says:
with a sick combination of interpative dance
Rick says:
awesome

meow meow meow meow meow meow meow

Animals learn to speak

Animals leaned to speak
“I’m not your friend I am your slave
It’s all I’ve been all along”
The dog barked at the man
“You’re not beautiful just look at you…”
The dove cooed the duck it was wrong
“It ain’t never gonna change”
The tadpole bubbled for the frog
It isn’t ever going to change…

Smthng lft smthng mssng

Scars are ridges rising like mountains on her arms
Her Legs and breasts cold and harmed
She cannot stand, but she can speak

I’m not broken I’m just bent,
I’m not all empty I’m just spent.

I’m not this thing to be pitied I’m not a freak
I’m not fragile I’m not fucking weak

"This is a gift from the Iraqis; a farewell kiss, you dog. This is from the widows, the orphans and those who were killed in Iraq"
-Muntadar al' Zaidi

Effing finally.
Now 1 more year and I want to stay youthful indefinitely

<><

StuNM|ble
each steps starting to look like the 4th grade self portrait on moms fridge
H-h-hold onto that bohhttle
it's cold but grasp it with both hands like that milk glass was held so it didn't get spilled
skinnis wwarm,
like hugging the dog after getting home.
Your head pounpounpounds,
fingars hurrt
t-t-tremors
SHAKE!
tr-tre-tremors
SHAKE!
Where's mom to make it better
SHAKE!
It burns like the cough medicine
SHAKE!
Want to feel better want..
It burns like cough medicine
...
it burns like cough medicine...
..it...

The creamy block was left in the fridge for three no wait, make it four days past it's expiry.
It's containing wrap was half ripped open and the tofu was partially used.
(A thin layer of sticky thick off white residue had devoloped on it's exterior)
The tofu had come in a half a pound block, what was left of it was similar to ones standard tofu,
It should be clarified that it was firm tofu, softs consistency would be quite distant from what was left in the fourteen by six by eight crisper.
The other occupying substances included a chunk of cheddar(cracker barrel) and an assortment of cold cuts. Those aren't important though. The thing to remember is the slick, creamy chunk of tofu, and this time frame which could be categorized as "The almost end"
That's what's to be remembered
That's what's important.
Goodbye tofu.